The Role of Fear - By Leah Gauntlett

Written By: Leah Gauntlett

Category: Reflective essay

Competition: Global Poetry and Creative Writing Competition 2026

In the Global Poetry and Creative Writing Competition 2026, Leah Gauntlett presents a deeply moving reflective essay titled "The Role of Fear." This poignant piece explores the complex emotions surrounding loss and the courage found in acceptance. Gauntlett's essay offers a personal journey through the fear and grace witnessed during her grandfather's final days, drawing readers into the intimate experience of facing mortality with dignity and strength.

About the Work

Leah Gauntlett's essay delves into the raw emotions of witnessing a loved one's passing. The narrative captures the stark contrast between the writer's fear and the peaceful acceptance displayed by her grandfather. The essay's vivid imagery and contemplative tone invite readers to reflect on their own experiences with fear and courage, emphasizing the profound impact of her grandfather's fearlessness on her life.

The role of fear

Original Submission by Leah Gauntlett

The role of fear

The soft, early morning light poured in through a gap in the curtains and illuminated the pale face of a man. A face that was covered by an intricate web of wrinkles that spread gracefully across his skin like the contour lines of a map.

The steady, rhythmic beep of the monitors in the room unsettled me. Their constant regularity, like the beat of a cold, robotic heart. The smell of sickness burned my nose.

His skin was almost translucent, revealing the ghostly white bones of his arms and his many knotted networks of dark blue veins. My fingernails dug deep into my palms as hot tears burned my eyes. The droplets traced their way down my cold cheeks and I heard them falling quietly onto the old woollen carpet. I hated seeing my grandfather like this: so weak, so fragile, so helpless.

My breaths became fast and shallow and a hollow fear gripped my chest. I could feel how close he was to slipping away from us.

I had never thought about death much before that day. I had never felt so close to it before. I don't think I realised how much the idea of death terrified me until I could feel it so close.

On the drive home, I don't know how my mom could see the road through the stream of tears that rolled down her face. We both knew that we had probably seen him for the last time.

A few days later my grandfather passed away in his bed. I remember feeling extremely angry that my last memory of him would be poisoned by that terrible illness. I was angry that cancer had robbed him of the dignities that I know were so important to him. I was angry that he had been forced to spend the last hours of his life in fear. But then I thought back to when I had clasped his frail hand for the last time and looked into his old, wise eyes. I could not remember seeing a single shred of fear there. There was instead, an expression of graceful and courageous acceptance.

Several weeks later his funeral was held in a small church in the middle of town. I sat on a cold, uncomfortable pew as people I had never met got up on the stage and spoke about my grandfather. I remember thinking to myself, while the priest read the generic eulogy about what a nice man my grandfather had been, that yes, he had been a nice man, but that if that priest had really known him, he would have described him as fearless.

I don't really understand how fear works, how we can feel it for our loved ones as they lie dying, while they stare death fearlessly in the face. However I do know that

my grandfather was fearless that day, and that his fearlessness has stayed with me ever since. I don't know if I will ever be as brave as he was that day, but I do know that I will try, and that from somewhere, far away, he will be guiding me.

About the Competition

The Global Poetry and Creative Writing Competition 2026 by Hashtag Kalakar celebrates diverse voices in the literary arts. This prestigious event invites participants worldwide to share their unique perspectives through poetry, essays, and creative writing. The competition fosters a global community of writers, encouraging creative expression and the sharing of powerful, personal stories.

We extend our heartfelt thanks to Leah Gauntlett for sharing "The Role of Fear" with us in the Global Poetry and Creative Writing Competition 2026. Her essay beautifully captures the essence of courage and acceptance in the face of loss. We are grateful for her contribution and the inspiration it offers to many.

About Hashtag Kalakar

Hashtag Kalakar is a creative platform dedicated to providing artists, writers, singers and other creative talents with opportunities to showcase their work and reach wider audiences through competitions, features and creative initiatives.