You Are Something to Me, But Idk That Something Yet.

By Shruti Shah

lonely.

been feeling lately,

that I’m fading slowly.

don’t want no more,

no love anymore.

broken hearts everywhere,

can’t anymore can I bear

tragic death of mine

due to some relationship

only leading to despair.

this world already ain’t fair.

I know I won’t be spared.

but somehow,

the memory of your smell

casts a magic spell,

everytime on my heart,

when me and the world are apart.

I’m alone as hell.

but truth be told,

my heart just wants to dwell

in yours.

the thought of you

makes me dance;

dance carelessly

under the sky,

declaring you and the stars mine.

my eyes fell for your soul,

I want you take control,

of my head and heart,

whole.

just don’t crush ‘em.

they are too precious.

they don’t deserve to be broken.

giving you my all,

just don’t let me fall,

in the darkness

of the world’s soul.

that night,

20/11/21,

was a delight.

won’t ever let anyone taste it,

cause something in the air was divine.

the way your fingers touched me,

our bodies so close,

I swear that night was magical

and I wanna make such magic happen more.

craving the taste of your lips,

my lips sat alone and still.

waiting were they for your lips to come close,

to caress them and blur their woes.

few hours with you on the phone,

I visit heaven uncalled.

the tone of your okays,

the sound of your breath,

makes me glide into the depths of your heart

and just never come back.

lately I’ve been witnessing

the world going deaf,

but somehow you make me feel heard,

my scars heal

and my life less burned.

when asked by you

to plan our weekend,

I didn’t say it out loud,

but in my mind,

we were just lying in your bed,

feeling each others’ breath,

snogging till death.

just come here soon,

we’d lie under the moon,

doing nothing;

mostly tolerating each others’ shit

and maybe fucking.

I’ve mastered this art of not giving a fuck,

after someone scarred me,

leaving my heart feel like a jerk.

he left my heart soaking wet,

from the tears that my eyes didn’t deserve to shed.

from thereon,

I promised my heart to keep her close

and just smother her bros

if they dare to coze.

lately I’ve been practicing detachment,

but with you,

its somehow starting to fall apart.

years of pondering

landed me on web of truths:

lying and pretending are not my passion,

but somehow the world lures me in.

don’t count on me cause I’m a maniac,

if I get obsessed I’ll never ever leave ya.

but,

if I genuinely love you,

I’d die for you,

die taking care of you.

By Shruti Shah