Why Do I Feel Bad?

By Swatantra Khandelwal

Group 1- Rakesh, Mohit, Suresh, Mahesh, Bhavesh and Lopesh

Group 2- Bhopesh, Rohan, Prakhar, Apurv, Raakh

Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock

Loud and hasty sounds of knocking on the door were heard.

It was almost like the person who was knocking was panicking.

Soon Rakesh, the only sober guy among us, was awakened by the sound of knocking and came to check.

Affected by his stupor he forgets to check the outside situation before opening the door.

He simply opened the hatch and turned the knob to open the door, however, the first thing he saw woke him up from his sleep hangover and he instinctively slammed the door shut.

The hand he saw outside had a pistol in it.

He immediately peeped outside through the peephole only to see 5 police officers standing outside the door.

He immediately felt a panic attack and also felt a chill.

Instinctively he called out “who’s there? And why do you have a gun?”

Fortunately, the police officer seemed to understand his reaction and explained politely.

He said that their family had been trying to find and contact them for the last 3 hours without any results which is why the police were called.

Listening to his explanation he once again looked outside the door through the peephole to find their family members standing behind the police officers.

This relaxed his tense mind and he opened the door.

When the police and the family members saw the inside of the house they found Mohit, Suresh, Mahesh, Bhavesh, and Lopesh all sleeping in weird places and with weird postures.

From their prior experience and also their own life experience they could see that these people all drank themselves to sleep.

The first thing the police officer did was splash cold water on the sleeping guys to wake them up then he let the family members of the drunk guys meet them to relieve their panic.

Soon the family members were relieved to see their kids and soon gave way to the police.

Because the police had already warned them not to reveal any details of the incident to these guys, the family members did not tell them anything.

So the police sat down and one person came out to ask these guys about what happened the night before today.

The sudden inquiry was a bit scary to them, also remembering the previous worry on their parent’s faces they were well aware that there seemed to be a big problem.

One by one they tried to look at their parents who assured them that everything was okay and they should answer the police’s questions.

Following this, they started narrating the events that happened before they woke up in great detail.

They started the narration from the beginning of the party/celebration where they gathered drinks and food to celebrate their coming-of-age ceremony as well as their graduation.

They decided to integrate both celebrations into one single celebration.

Next, they told them about the people at the party and briefly told them what all happened at the party.

Soon they reached the point when the group split, One part of which decided to sleep there and the other decided to drive to the nearby beach to watch the sunset.

However, they were hesitant to talk about the part where a bunch of their friends decided to drive whilst drunk.

However, seeing the situation it was clear that they weren’t going to release before they tell the complete story.

Soon they spoke about how everyone had a plan to go stargazing at the beach and how Prakhar suddenly had the idea of wanting to drive there but Lopesh was complete against the idea of driving in their drunk state which led to an argument between them.

This argument spiraled into a group split where some people supported Prakhar and his idea of driving to the beach while others supported Lopesh and were against drunk driving.

He looked at the others and said that everyone here are those who stood with Lopesh.

They tried to convince Prakhar and everyone else to not drive in a drunk condition however they failed to persuade them.

This ended up spoiling their mood and they decided to sleep instead of going anywhere else.

This was the end of their story.

The police compared their story and confirmed that they were telling the truth.

Also, there was a special boy among them who even directly said that they had always been at home and did not know about anything that happened outside, however, the other group who was at the beach could have seen it.

That boy seemed to assume that something had taken place in the neighborhood and the police had come here to ask them if they saw anything.

However they were wrong.

The police had not come here for the neighbourhood, rather they were here for them.

The police officer looked at these guys who were still in confusion and answered their doubts, “Bhopesh, Rohan and Apurv are dead while Prakhar and Raakh have sustained fatal injuries and are still in a critical condition.”

“They might also lose their lives”

This news sent goosebumps to all six of them.

Rakesh and Mohit even lost their balance and fell down.

Although the others did not fall they were not much better.

Each of them had shock on their faces while chills ran down their spine.

Rakesh who was still unable to getup wanted to question the police officer however before he could do that he remembered the look of relief on their parents face when they opened the door.

Connection that he felt that the news was most likely true and the relief on their parents face was due to finding them safe and sound.

So he changed his question and instead asked him, “How did it happen?”

“Car Crash”

“We found their car crashed into a tree. The two who were in the front survived while the three in the backseat were dead on the spot”

“We were investigating the case and according to your testimony the most likely reason for the crash is drunk driving”

These words came as a shock to Rakesh.

“Officer can we take our kids home now?”

The officer turned to look at his assistant who proceeded to nod.

“Yes you can take them, but remember to keep your phone alert at all times before the case closes.”

At home Rakesh takes a bath and falls back on the bed and stares at the ceiling in a daze.

He feels confused and decides to take a rest.

Soon a few days pass from the accident and Prakhar becomes the only survivor of the incident however he has lost all activity in his left hand and has many minor problems across his body.

Sonn the police and hospital reports come out and declare that the accident was a result of Prakhar’s drunk driving.

While all this was happening Rakesh was falling deep into guilt.

From the day he leart that they entered into an accident he started to blame himself for not stopping them from going.

He was the only one I the group who did not participate in the argument back then which led to the number in both groups being 5-5.

He was just feeling really sleepy that day and had already decided to sleep instead of going to the beach which is why he did not see any point in participating in the argument.

Which is why now he feels bad for various reasons.

He feels that if he tried to stop them it would meke them pressurized and give up the idea of going thus saving their lives.

He also feels that if he decided to go to the beach that day he could save them as he was completely sober and could drive the car perfectly fine.

Not only this he also has started to get nightmares where he can see Bhopesh, Rohan, Prakhar, Apurv, and Raakh accusing him of not saving them when he had the ability to do so.

However despite these guilt filled thoughts he still maintains a trace of reason and questions whether he is really responsible for the accident.

But he does not get a response.

All that remains with him is a question “Why do I feel bad?”

By Swatantra Khandelwal