Tough

By Parul Singh

It was tough for me to walk beside you or match your footsteps. I really wanted to hold your hands while covering those sandy beaches. But I would fall short of breath everytime I tried catching up with your pace.

You know, a lot of times, I would stop in between our walks, just to watch you turning into a blurry image. It was kind of healing to watch you walk from behind, leaving your footprints...

Ah, and you never believed in turning back.

I always complained how much I miss holding your hands but you never allowed me to do so.

Well, holding onto something was never your thing. Everyone around you took it otherwise; but that's who you were.

And that's who I loved.

You were so unlike me.

You were all about strong winds, wildflowers, abandoned buildings, and oceans. I, on the other hand, was more into sand houses, paintings, slow music, and cubicles. I loved staying in boundaries, not crossing the lines.

For you, it was so hard to return to the same place and watching the same set of faces. Had it been upon you, then you might have never returned to yourself too!

You never permitted me to capture you in anything - either in my heart or my poetries.

And I tried - I tried very hard - to not search for the stories inside you. But I failed drastically.

I remember that morning when you took a promise that I wouldn't be sad and cry for more than four days if ever you left. Well, I knew that you were going to leave. Sooner.

I knew that you loved yourself but disliked equally. Being in your own company, staying in your own skin was too much for you.

I promised you.

And just like any other day, your image started diminishing into nothing.

The people around me thinks that they can capture you into this wooden box but hey, they're wrong. Your frame can be captured but not your soul. I know you are happy... The flowers around me are in a jolly mood. They are screaming your name. You are a part of their family now.

Me?

I am happy too. I have lived my eternity with you. I am at peace and yeah, smiling too.

By Parul Singh