By Aneri Desai
My grandpa reversed the car and soon people heading in all different directions halted. We had just picked up some pav bhaji. It's smell helped me stay calm. My grandpa then said, the problem is that no one wants to wait! Months later, I was on my way back home from not such a tiring day, a rather lovely day actually. I waited wherever I could and let other vehicles pass by, for I wanted to be the kind of person who waited in traffic:) My waiting, it certainly didn't bring any change to the traffic or the people. But my widespread smile appeared out of nowhere and lasted for a mile. I must learn to wait. But, how must I wait? Must I, with immense love in my heart while going out in the rain without a cover or while having an ice cream, while cooking a mediocre dish, while looking and wanting to be like a hop of the sparrow or while sitting back and looking at the midnight sky? What will change if I accomplish this? I often say that I am lost. But what does it even mean? In an attempt to understand, I intentionally got lost as I turned off the navigation and took a new route on the way back home. I wasn't feeling anxious, neither was I feeling the thrill of an adventure. There was however, a want to see something familiar, to feel the comfort of my home. Is that what feeling lost means? But, upon reaching home, this feeling of being lost still remained. So, perhaps there is something more. Where then shall I lay my head? What if I know where to lay my heart? Will anything change then? If I learn to wait with unconditional love for people and situations and being very well aware of the possibility that nothing will come out of it, the probability of not receiving help, waiting with the guilt of asking for help, with the ability to love without being bothered of being loved back or even worse, will then I not be lost? That seems worth the wait, doesn't it?
By Aneri Desai
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