The Saffron Merge

By Preeti Trehan

Packing with great care the tiniest clothes I have seen

Worrying if I have everything a mother would need

“It will all fall in place”, my mother knows magic, she puts my mind to rest

When my baby comes home, I will make sure she is safe in our little nest

Packing her suitcase that’s splitting at the seams

Worrying that this is definitely not everything she needs

I sigh – all I want is for her to be safe and happy while away

I need magic to pack a piece of home for her but all I can do is pray

It’s time!!! Oh God! I announce bewildered and a little scared

We rush out the doors to embrace the happiness that’s on its way

The drive is quick and sharp, just like the pain; the contractions make me grimace

All I want is to fast forward these spasms and just see my baby’s face

It’s time!!! Let’s not be late I say - composed look in place

The drive is quiet and slow, a U turn seems the only solace

She will be fine; she has to go back to her world; my mind prattles away

Why don’t I have a magic wand, I want to rewind to the beginning of her stay!

PUSH! PUSH!!! you are almost there – come on be brave, is all I am told

Focus! think of the baby you are going to hold

My tears flow freely, childbirth is painful, but I live to tell the tale

I know my world is changed forever, there’s a cheer when we hear her wail

HOLD!!! HOLD!!! I tell myself; I instruct my tears to wait

Have to keep smiling until she walks through those departure gates

My heart and head debate - I feel the vacuum already; why must she leave the nest

it’s the circle of life, All Moms know it is for the best

Hello, my love! you are finally here, I smile through my tears

It’s magical to hold you in my arms, elation takes over my fears

How I longed for you and here you are – my little girl

A lifetime to love and cherish you, my dreams seem to unfurl

Goodbye, my love! my embrace is big, the smile still strong

I am full of gratitude as I hold her close, sadness seems wrong

My little girl has achieved so much, my heart swells with pride

You go girl, conquer the world, take it all in your stride

Sitting in your room, your nursery, I hold you close to my bosom

This journey we have embarked on, we will be a happy twosome

I feel special to once again experience this mother daughter bond

Roles are switched, I am the mother here, will I too have a magic wand?

Sitting in your room, alone, my sadness exploding in my chest

Sweeps over me in a wave of tears, once again it is an empty nest

I want my mother and my daughter and that magic wand

To color me, soak me in the fragrance of their love, like a saffron frond.

By Preeti Trehan