The Fallibility Princess

By Deepika

“Kalindiiiiiii”, the elevated voice of the king sent shivers down Kalindi’s spine as she peeped into the king’s chamber.

“Ohhhh fat-hhhherrrrr no-notttthing,” replied Kalindi with a trembling voice and a horrified face.

“Why the hell are you here? Didn’t I explicitly order you to practice? Are you engrossed in writing poetry again?” Mitravarun questioned her with an annoyed voice.

“No, Father, my hand is injured, which is why I can’t practice today. I came to inform you,” Kalindi replied in a low voice.

“Once again, you’re resorting to excuses to avoid practicing. But what about your injury when you indulge in writing poetry?” Mitravarun asked furiously.

“I’m sorry, Father. Today, I will practice more than I have been,” Kalindi humbly bowed her head in respect.

“Good, now go quickly. Don’t waste my precious time,” Mitravarun said.

Kalindi quickly fled the chamber as soon as possible.

“This girl will never change; she behaves childishly and is not perfect in everything, only prominent in poesy, which I abominate, and somewhat eminent in sword fighting. She is far from the perfection of a queen. What to do with her? No matter how strict I am she is still careless. Mitravarun huffed.

{ “corrected_sentence”: “”Worry not, dear. Everything will be fine. Now Kalindi is improving and has also stopped writing poetry like she used to,” Sanjana replies, pacifying Mitravarun.

“No, dear. It’s not about worry; she is careless. And all these years, what I never wished to happen, now Kalindi is like that. Always poetry, poetry. Have you noticed? She speaks less and mentions verses most of the time. Don’t you remember? Instead of saying anything for the first time, she spoke like singing or poesy. From childhood, the way she speaks sounds like poetry,” Mitravarun sighs.

In his mind, thinking he won’t change, Sanjana quietly left the arena.

Sanjana sometimes feels Mitravarun’s obsession is annoying.

“I am not perfect but could you love perfectly?” Kalindi yells angrily.

“Kali, dear, chill out. Let it go, please. Tranquil.” Ashwini tries to pacify Kalindi.

“Oh God, this father and daughter duo have the same traits,” Kala huffs.

“Just shut up, OK, I am not like our father. I am different and I embrace my uniqueness, which he considers a waste. Kalindi was annoyed as she swiftly wielded her sword.”

“Now, who wants to play my favorite game? Ashwini exclaimed” giving clear signals to kala.

“Yeah, Anna, I’m getting bored. I don’t think I can handle Kalindi’s tackles,” Kala said, slightly tapping her forehead.

Kalindi glares at them.

“Kali, don’t give us that scary look. You look like an intimidating bitch because you’re amazing at what you do,” Kala ran away and Ashwini laughed at Kala’s comment.

Kalindi chased after Kala, leaving her sword behind.

Kala signaled to Ashwini that their plan was successful.

Kala and Ashwini didn’t want Kalindi to engage in sword fighting due to her hand injury.

Heeding her brother, Kalindi realized what he was up to.

Anew Kalindi glares at her brothers and starts focusing on her sword fighting.

This made Ashwini and Kala disappointed because their plan had failed.

Kalindi throws a sword in front of Kala, challenging him.

With a smirk, Kala caught the sword.

Both Kala and Kalindi were fully absorbed in their sword fighting.

Suddenly, from behind, Ashwini came and took Kalindi’s sword, then he ran.

Kalindi gasped and although she was happy to feel her brother’s pampering, she feared the consequences if her nanna found out she hadn’t practiced much. Determined not to let that happen, Kalindi runs after Ashwini.

Ashwini, unaware of Kalindi’s determination, explores the entire palace while poor Kalindi, scared of her nanna’s reaction, chases after him.

Both Ashwini and Kala are stunned to see Kalindi running after them.

They had assumed she would be too tired to keep up because she couldn’t run much.

“It seems that fear can make the impossible possible,” Ashwini whispers.

“You’re right anna, ayyo my dear sister. Let’s continue our plan,” Kala said, winking at Ashwini, who smirked in response.

Kalindi finally caught up with her brothers, gasping for air.

Suddenly, she felt two arms wrap around her, lifting her up, and two hands covered her eyes and blindfolded her with a black cloth.

“Anna, please stop. I need to practice. Let’s play tomorrow,” Kalindi pleaded, struggling to break free from his grip. But all her efforts were in vain.

Her strength was insufficient in the presence of her brothers.

Without warning, Kala removes the cloth and Ashwini throws her, causing her to fall into the water.

Both Ashwini and Kala jump in together.

For a while, Kalindi forgets everything and enjoys playing in the water.”

For sometime they enjoy boat riding,

“See I defeated you both, I won, I won” Kalindi exclaimed cheerfully, had she won the match. Both Kala and ashwini grin, seeing her childishness.

Three of them started playing with pichkaris for some time.

Suddenly, Kalindi got an idea to play ankh chupi” in the river.

Kala and Kalindi are blindfolded ashwini.

“This is cheating and injustice, you both always make me the catcher” Ashwini huffed. In response, he gets giggles from Kalindi and Kala.

Three of them became catchers one after one. After a time, they felt the game was boring.

“Hey, Anna, stop throwing water at me. Throw it at this idiot,” Kalindi says with annoyance, pointing at Kala.

“Who’s the idiot? You bitch,” Kala taunts while splashing water at Kalindi.

“I’m leaving now; you two are just having fun,” Kalindi pouts and walks out.

“Oh, come on, my little doll. Let’s play a little longer, please,” Kala and Ashwini pleaded, pulling her along.

“Alright, fine,” Kalindi reluctantly agrees, continuing her game.

They all have a great time. Suddenly, Kalindi smirks. She has a cunning plan in mind.

Observing her brothers completely absorbed in their game, Kalindi executes her plan. She intentionally falls, making her hand hit a sharp rock.

Now, Kalindi is underwater in the river.

After a few seconds,

“Anna, where is Kali?” Kala asks suddenly, realizing that Kalindi is missing.

“She may be left for practice”, Ashwini replied.

“Kali, hey, Kali,” Ashwini shouts while going out to search for Kalindi.

“Kali, are you playing hide and seek? If yes and you can hear me, please come outside immediately!” Kala shouts, panic evident in her voice.

On the other hand,

Kalindi’s hand, which was hit by a stone, is throbbing with intense pain.

Her intention was to die underwater and Ashwini Kala is unaware of her suicidal thoughts.

Kalindi is not able to breathe and water is going into her nose, causing unbearable uneasiness for her. She tried to calm herself, but it was not possible. Every millisecond is like a century to her. God knows how she was able to bear all this. Maybe the desire of death is undefeatable by any torture. She bubbles in the water.

Kalindi screams out in agony, unable to bear it any longer.

Desperate to silence herself, she covers her mouth with the other hand, hoping that Kala and Ashwini won’t hear her.

But all her efforts were in vain. Kala and Ashwini realize that she is submerged underwater.

“Brother, she will be fine na! Please, Mighty lord, save my sister”, Kala prayed and asked Ashwini.

“Kala, please relax. This is not the time to panic. We must save her quickly”, Ashwini patted Kala’s shoulder, ensuring everything would be alright.

Without wasting any time, they both swim towards her.

“Kala, you go to the east side and I will go to the west side”, ashwini said, and Kala nodded.

Without wasting time, they rapidly started searching inside the water.

After searching for two minutes, Kala locates Kalindi. Sensing her brother’s presence, Kalindi moves away and pretends to seek help.

Kala and Ashwini quickly pull Kalindi out of the river and begin checking her pulse and breathing.

Thankfully, she is alive and fine.

Kala pushed her stomach, pushed her to blow and vomit water through her mouth and nose. She wasn’t able to breathe so she opened her mouth to breathe and for some fresh air.

Kalindi couldn’t help but feel like a person whom death itself doesn’t want to embrace. The most unlucky one in the world.

Kalindi attempts to sit up, and her brothers lend a helping hand.

“Kali, go to your room, rest and have leisure. Don’t worry about anything,” Ashwini soothes her, gently stroking her hair.

Kalindi took leave of her brothers,

Kalindi spends a few minutes in her room to reassure her brothers that she is resting.

Eventually, she musters the courage to re-enter the arena and try once again.

Anew, she entered the arena with determination.

Despite facing difficulty with moving her hand, she remains unfazed.

Kalindi persistently attempts to retrieve a sword, and after much effort, she successfully lifts it.

After thirty minutes, Kala and Ashwini find out Kalindi went to practice through a maid. They both quickly dash towards the practice arena.

“Kalindi, please refrain, see the blood is flowing from your hand like a flood”, taking a sword from her hand, Kala and ashwini said in union, showing concern.

But Kalindi is adamant she chooses to die over bending slightly.

“Please refrain from attempting to dissuade me. I am resolute in my decision to practice, even if it leads to injury. Any interference from you, or anyone else, will not be tolerated. I will not hesitate to report you to Nanna and you know the consequences. I am relentless in my pursuit of improvement. Kalindi replied sternly, taking her sword back.

Both Kala and Ashwini hopelessly gave up their tries to convince her.

And they depart, they hurried out to locate their father to stop Kalindi. As only Mitravarun can stop kalindi from practicing.

She dedicated five hours to continuous practice, her sword fighting despite enduring unresolved pain causing a major injury.

The maid interrupts her training to inform her that

“Princess Maharani is summoning kalindi for dinner” said the maid with a low-pitched voice”.

“However, I declined the meal as my hunger is nonexistent today.” Kalindi determined,

She headed towards her vast and elegant chamber.

In the chamber,

Kalindi lay down on a fine bed.

Swinging her legs, she started to weep and she broke down. Not able to bear the immense pain she caused, opening her recovering injury again.

Kalindi is right now having a panic attack. Her breath is very thin now. Her whole body, especially injury burning, causing nervous breakdown.

“Oh Lord, why the hell am I alive? Why the hell was I born? Just to feel this wrecked and wrenched existence? Just to feel hatred filling my eyes for me? When I am not able to reach the mountain of my parents’ belief, expectations and desire, wait what about reaching? I am not even able to fulfill my parents’ wishes when I am not perfect.

Why should I live with losing my poesy? They coerced me to sacrifice my poesy and even after abandonment they are still displeased with me. I have become a blank verse within the realm of verse, in a poesy which is neither filled nor allowing someone to write. I agree I love sword fighting, but it does not bestow me the capability to defeat Ashwini Anna. You only vouchsafe a boon to the vijayapura, so but, how can I possibly overcome such a formidable opponent? We both stand as unbeatable forces, yet my nanna refuses to comprehend and perceive my struggles.Instead, he always wants me to be the way he desires. I am like a puppet in his hands. I should do what he wants, and if I don’t play like he wants, then he just wishes, I should disappear from the world ( death ), like how a child throws toys in anger. He kicked me out of his life.

My family is a great and happy family ever claps sarcastically.

They don’t even see me like a human. Don’t I have feelings? My mother thinks I am an emotionless stone-hearted soul. I am like a useless stone in their eyes. Although I am a diamond covered by mud, called blindness of their perfectness, which does not allow me to shine, neither are they able to see my glow. Gold is also just like a normal stone, right? Before someone clears the dust around that and gives a form, it add sharpening, shining won’t appear the same with me because of my father’s restrictions, my talent is merged and disappeared somewhere.

He wants me to copy him and my brother. How can I copy someone? Humans can’t be the same. That’s our specialty, and we have different talents.

If everyone is perfect, then whom will we praise? Why can’t my father understand me but rather expect me to understand them? How many times I have to understand them? I am fed up with them.

As coins have two faces, my poesy and sword fighting are two sides without one side coin is unworthy, isn’t it? Same in my case. I am fed up with acting always with joy and down-to-earth. Why can’t anyone be the ocean of agony flowing in my eyes? Like the scared river yamuna,

Sadly, no one loves me, not even my brothers. At least as siblings, they should comprehend me, but no, they blindly believe father is accurate and faultless. He is doing this for my welfare, it seems. But what kind of welfare is this when you showcase that my worth is reduced to nothing in front of a copper coin. What kind of support is it? When you underestimate my talent and disparage it,

What kind of atrocious life I have got. I am not even allowed to see my beloved solace “the fascinating moon”. Wait, wait, what does? Nanna claim! Now I became like the moon an imperfect fallibility not like the perfect sun wow kalindi claps sarcastically. What’s the problem if the moon is not perfect? Wait wait, how come the moon is not perfect? The moon always exists but sometimes it won’t shine. It doesn’t mean there is no moon. Same like that right now my poesy is sparkling it does not mean I am not a perfect warrior or I am bad in the sword fighting. He talks about perfectness. Where is perfection in his love? Sometimes he says to die and sometimes behaves like he pampers me the most.

Mujhe toh chand keha diya magar vuska kya jiskeliye apka Prem Chand ki chaya jaisa sheetal hai,

Mai perfect nhi hosakti hu lekin kya apka pyaar perfect hosakta hai?,

Jab maa se shubh samachar mila tab apke man mein chand naam ki pyaar mere janam se pehale hi janam liya.( चंद्राकार first phase ),

Jab apne mothe haathon mein pehli baar meri najuk si haath pakda

Jab pehli baar mujhe godh mein liya tab chand ka ( First Quarter ) प्रथम चतुर्थी jaisi chand ki tarah roshini ka barsaat hone laga,

Jab pehli baar apko nanna kaha tab बढ़ता हुआ चाँद ( gibbous ) ki tarah apka dil ka chamak ne lage the,

Jab pehli baar talwar pakadke apko hara diya pournami ( full moon ) ki tarah garv karne lage mere upar aur apka noor jaise andhakar ko mita rahi thi,

Lekin jaise mai badi hoti jaa rahi hu apko kya hogaya? Apka pyaari tej andhakar mein kyu chala gaya?

Kya iska matlab ap pyaar nhi karte abhi mujh se? Nhi na, jaise chand amavasya ke din na dikhne ki wajah se ye matlab nhi hota woh waha nhi hai, Waise imperfection hone ki wajah ye matlab nhi hota vuska koyi wajhud nhi ya kisi kaam ka kabil nhi hai wo, insaan ke andhar ka kala perfectness jaga ne ke bazaye kisi aur cheez mein kyu dundte ho jaise koyi andha ghaate mein paani ko dundh raha ho.

I wish you could hear my words and feel my feelings. Kalindi sighs.

Fie on me I failed as a daughter. At least I should fulfill one desire of my parents. She gasped for some air and continued her grieving.

Kalindi remembered her father’s words,

“Why don’t you die once? And end our suffering instead of constantly tormenting and killing us with your lunacy poesy. It is absolutely disgraceful that the vijayapura princess is not the finest princess. Fie on you, Kalindi. I proudly asserted before the kings that my princess could never compare to the moon, and the name Chandini did not suit her. You easily proved my father wrong.

Aaahhhh Chandiniiiiiiiiiiiii,he sarcastically called her with a disgusting expression. I hate you so much. May Lord Surya never bless anyone, not even my enemies, with such a repulsive daughter. You are the only flaw in my otherwise perfect life. My citizens laugh and pity me solely because I am the father of a useless grass like you. Why don’t you just die??

Show us some mercy and kill us, feed us the ink you used to write your poesy. At least it would taste better than the food you cook. When he eats food cooked by her.

Don’t you have any work? You’re not the daughter of a maid to have free time to indulge in poesy. It was indeed a grievous sin and my gravest mistake to yearn for a daughter like you, constantly engrossed in frivolous poesy. He relentlessly mocked her barbs and derided her,

He used to repeat the same dialogue he told her atleast fifty times.

But Kalindi is not one to endure such treatment silently. She would fiercely unleash her wrath upon her father, countering his remarks with flawless retorts. She refuses to tolerate any form of disrespect, even if it comes from her own father. For her, self-respect holds greater importance than societal expectations and life. Her family consistently marvels at her unwavering courage, undeterred by the fact that he is the patriarch. And her brothers always asks her with astonished looks how come you are able to speak like that. Her family always tries to stop her and never listen her words.

Kalindi stopped her outburst and got up from bed.

Enough of this torture dear, let’s give mukti ( peace ) to them and yourself and remember atleast in next life you should not born as a princess. Kalindi said to herself infront of mirror sniffling.

Kalindi took cotton and kept it in her noses. Started chanting Hari name as it is said before dying one should chant Hari name for peace.

Mai bistar pe leti hu

Khaske saason ko pakad

Haath mere nakh ko pakda

Saans ko rokh ke rakha

Jo kapaas maut ka nishani hai

Wo marne se pehale yi pehan liya

Saas nhi chal rahi

Magar phir bhi tumhari diya

Zakhmon ka saya kyu meri peecha padi hai?

I am lying on my bed with determination,

Gripping my breath tightly,

My hand firmly clutches my nose,

Preventing any intake of air,

The cotton, a symbol of mortality,

I adorned before I welcomed death,

I refuse to breathe,

Yet the pain you inflicted upon me,

Still lingers in the depths of my soul?



On the opposite hand,

“You know, Kalindi really was injured and she wasn’t even able to move her hand. Why allow her to practise?”both kala and ashwini together clamour on the king(Mitravarun )

“Whatttttttttttttttt? Why why Whyn’t she say it to us? How is her injury?” Sanjana asked, agonizing.

“Yes, Amma, she shared with father he didn’t care, so she thought not to tell any of us cause, she felt it is waste of time and none of us will bother” Ashwini replied politely.

“Did she skip her practice?” Mitravarun asked coldy.

On the other hand

Dheere dheere haath kamp ne lagi hai

Pav dard kar raha hai

Hosh mein hu

Magar

Behoshi hai

Mai sun pa rahi hu sab kuch

Lekin ek shabdh bhi nhi kaha

Andhrakar hi Andhakar charon taraf

Peedhadayak tha shanti ka ye mahol

Meri yeh deh nhi sehan kar raha ab

Haath chodna chahati hu

Magar shayad marne ka echa ke samne

Bhada ka bhojy ko harna hi tha

Samay bheetha Jaa Raha hai

Mrityu pass aa Rahi

Aur mai zindagi ke bahon se chudti hu

Sola (16) shan hogaye

Ab jeevan ka sabse aasehanyia pal sehna hai

Bees (20) shan hogaye ab bas Mai

Dekh pa rahi hu Maut mere samne

Kadi hai

Yamaraj yamapasam leke khada hai

Ek shan ki deri hai

Aur mai maut ke godh mein rahungi

Gradually, my hand trembles,

Legs ache,

I am conscious, yet unconscious,

I hear everything, yet unable to voice or respond,

Darkness envelops all four sides,

Silence suffocates; my body reaches its limit,

My hand yearns to release my nose,

But the desire for death triumphs

Over the weight of existence,

Time ticks away

As death nears,

And I drift away from the embrace of life,

16 minutes have elapsed,

The agonizing moment of existence commences,

20 minutes have passed,

I behold death standing before me,

Lord Yama prepared to seize my life at any instant,

Only one minute remains,

And I shall find solace in the realm of death.

Kalindi was thinking in her mind.

On the other side of the Maharaj’s chamber,

“What if she was submerged in the water? I didn’t ask her to practice in this situation”, Mitravarun’s voice sounded sad and low, he asked out of concern. Both Kala and ashwini narrated what happened in his absence,

Sadly, Mitravarun was out of the city. He came a few minutes back. Otherwise he would have stopped Kalindi at the right moment,

They all rapidly hurried off towards Kalindi’s room,

“Kalindi Kali have some food dear” Sanjana knocked on the door.

Kalindi feared they might find out about her suicide attempt.

They knocked on the door for ten minutes.

“Maybe she is sleeping. Let’s meet her tomorrow”. Mitravarun tried to pacify Sanjana.

They both leave the arena, but ashwini and Kala don’t leave, thinking Kalindi was scared to open the door because of Mitravarun’s presence.

Inside the vast chamber,

Suddenly, Kalindi faints. She is now about to die. No one could save her as she was breathing and she also fainted.

“Kalindi, kali, please open the door, and Amma nanna left.” Kala bangs door shrieking.

“Kalindi, I know you are hungry. We have brought food for you, please, dear opener,” Ashwini asked softly.

Even after two minutes of not getting any response, kala and Ashwini started panicking.

“Anna, she won’t do that, I mean she won’t commit suicide, right!,” Kala asks, panicking.

“Relax, kala, think positively.” Ashwini tried to calm him, hiding his panic.

Suddenly, Kala goes to see Kalindi through the casement.

And suddenly,

“Nnnnnnnnnnnooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo” kala yelps in shock.

“What happened, kala?” ashwini asked out of concern.

“Ann-nna kalindiiii” kala trembles

“What happened? Tell clearly, kala,” ashwini asks again, seeing kala sweating.

“Anna, look carefully. Kalindi was holding her breath, and she fainted. We don’t have time. We need to save quickly.” Kala hurried Ashwini. Kala knows about aryuveda, and he started doing more research, especially after knowing kalindi is not in normal stage.

Ashwini dashed towards his room at express speed. Quickly take the kalindi chamber keys. After Kalindi’s first suicide attempt, Ashwini became careful and took Kalindi’s chamber spare keys.

Ashwini rapidly runs and opens the chamber keys in a hurry.

Kala quickly removes cotton from Kalindi’s nose.

Kala lifted Kalindi and lay her down slowly on the swing on the balcony to give fresh air to Kalindi.

Kala stands beside Kalindi and starts fanning to give them oxygen.

On the other hand, Ashwini brings water and sprinkles water on Kalindi’s face.

Kala did the medical process. Finally, he succeeded.

Kalindi started moving and slowly opened her eyes.

Her expression is like she is stunned to see her brothers in front of her. For a moment, she couldn’t believe she was alive.

Kala and Ashwini’s pov :

Watching Kalindi gently opening her rose-petal eyes, I couldn’t help but feel a sense of relief, as if an enormous mountain was on the verge of crushing a mere rat that escaped in a mere.

It felt like, for a moment, my heart forgot to beat. The realization that she was alive reminded me of the overwhelming emotions experienced by the citizens of Dwarka when Dwarkadish entered with Syamanntaka, having mastery over death. At that moment, my heart seemed to momentarily cease beating, as if it yearned to embrace her tightly and never let her go, even if it meant defying heaven. My eyes were red, perhaps from anger or pain, but I felt an intense urge to scold Kalindi for her carelessness towards herself.

Kalindi’s pov:

I gently opened my lotus-petal eyes. I felt immense pain but had no energy to even scream. I saw ashwini Anna and Kala for a moment. I felt I was in heaven, but their expressions cleared my vision. I felt someone pouring water on the fire. I don’t understand why even death refused to embrace me. Am I that worse? Why is everyone unhuman with me? Without my realization, tears flowed from my orbs like a lake. I am myself in a doubt about why I want to embrace the gates of heaven.

Author’s pov:

Miserable Kalindi doesn’t even know what life is, and she wishes to end before starting the race. Who knows now, Kalindi is going to get another problem in my head. Just like a mountain falling on a little pebble.

Kalindi is trying to sit, and Kala is helping her to sit.

On the other hand, Ashwini darts to inform his parents about Kalindi’s suicide attempt.

“Whatttttttttttttttt noooooooo wayyyyyy it shouldn’t happen,” sanjana burst out.

Ashwini said what Kalindi had done to his parents.

Blood rushed into Mitravarun’s cheeks, and his face was reddened now like a tomato in anger.

Wait wait wait, are you not wondering why he is angry instead of feeling guilty? Wait a little more, you will get the reason behind his anger.

Kala embraced her tightly, causing her not to be able to breathe properly.

“Are you mad or what kali?, you took away my life for a moment.” Kala slightly taps kalindi’s head, wiping his tears, having mixed emotions.

Kala was delighted to see her sister alive, who was lying in bed like a dead body without motion.

“Why did you save me?” Kalindi looked straight into Kala’s eyes. Her eyes were reddened like roses.

“So you want me to let you die in front of me? We both shared everything, even before birth. How can I let you suffer alone? Kala asked her back with a broken voice.

We are the same seeds of the soil.

Ham ek paudhe ka do been Roop hai

Ek ke bina ek nhi r

Kalindi is about to reply suddenly, and the steps of someone shattered kalindi.

It was none other than the king Mitravarun, who is entering the chamber with his wife and eldest son.

The king dashed and straight away caught Kalindi’s arm tightly, causing her to be hurt.

“Why the hell do you behave like that? Why do you hunt us like this? What sinful act have we committed? That I got an awful offspring like you. Mitravarun roared, making kalindi amused in fear.

“How many times will you defame in the world like this?” Mitravarun questioned Kalindi.

“Instead of torturing us constantly, why the hell don’t you die one time? We will just cry one day. That’s better than suffering every day cause of you. “ Mitravarun shouted this time with a more high-pitched voice

Kalindi had a hard time controlling her emotions, she is like she could break down at any time, yet she tried her best to control herself.

Tears flowing from Kalindi’s orbs because of her father’s attitude and pitiful stage of her life like the heavy water fall between the two mountains.

Mitravarun is about to say something, but he is interrupted by the queen Sanjana.

“Please dear, be calm, don’t shout,” requested a low voice.

“Go the hell, Kalindi.” Mitravarun kept ranting for one hour and then left the chamber with his wife and sons.

Kalindi fell down with thud. She felt her knees have no energy to stand.

She started crying aloud and aloud. If someone is present, then they would have broken down seeing her pitiful stage. Words of her father’s rangs again and again in her mind.

Kalindi’s pov:

All these days, I had hope to live, I felt they’re sad to see me trying to erase my existence, but today, I realized how dumbo I am to think they still have feelings for me. For them, I am already dead, then why the hell you saved me, oh Lord, Kalindi screamed her lungs out, and now she started having hiccups.

“Whyyyyyyyyy, whyyyyyyyyy? Lord why only with these type of partiality? Am I alive just to watch worsen then worst? Don’t I have heart or feelings? Am I just a piece of trash? My family is throwing out like how a potter throws water after making pots.

Mitravarun words are repeated in her head like tape record.

“Kalindi, why don’t you die once?”

Kalindi closes her ears with hands to not hear words, and with unbearable pain she screams

“Stooooooopppppp itttttttttt, enough of all these torments.” Kalindi screwed her lungs out.

“Soo for him mylife is nothing wow, such a great father I have got”. Kalindi claps sarcastically

They claim they love me but never not even my time they showed, ignore love he didn’t even treat me like a living object

“For these self-obsessed person, I was going to scarifice my dreams and love?”

“Now I will no more tolerate this injustice” Kalindi declared to herself wiping tears and stands.

“But lord it hurts very had you know” Kalindi looks at Mighty lord with tried body weak, dull face and reddened eyes.

Kalindi is alone she closed the vast doors of her chamber. Not allowing anyone to come.

She cried again and again but, no one was there to console her.

I am a like the rose in the garden of sunflowers.

What is my fault if I was born different? Why I should follow everyone. Why dad can’t understand these.

Am I rose? No right, then why my soul is adorned with thorns?

All these days I had little hope to live but no I realized my family grieves over my life.

I am like a flower and your the honey Bees who enjoys my kindness and throws me away

Like how deers eat grass you ate me mercilessly

Kalindi slept due to crying aloud.

....................................................................

On the other hand

Mitravarun dash towards his chamber angrily.

The queen Sanjana really had hard time to stop breaking down.

As she entered the chamber she cried aloud her lungs out.

“Calm down sanju” Mitravarun just said this much to console her.

“How can I be calm dear? My doll wants die, what thing we lacked to provide her? We gave her full freedom, we allowed her to be strong dominating where women are considered as weak to be a warrior. Instead of being happy why she is torturing us like this? Why she is trying to die? Her voice broke.

Mitravarun eyes reddened hopelessly and due to controlling himself not to cry.

All the night, no one slept in the palace.

...........................................................................

Next day, the sun rises dazzlingly may be celebrating Kalindi’s unsuccessful suicide attempt.

In the chamber of kalindi,

“What happened kali please speak dear, we will sort out your problems” Kala asked softly trying to figure out reason behind her sadness.

Kalindi didn’t answered, her head down and silent like a statue.

You know yesterday how bad our parents felt?! Ashwini asked making kalindi trembling.

“Kalindi what happened? Are you okay? Ashwini asked caressing her palm and wore concern look.

Why the hell you are doing all this? To hurt us please don’t hurt us, kala blamed kalindi for her suicide attempt.

Still they didn’t get any response, seconds passed, minutes passed, hours passed still no response. Kalindi didn’t ate anything from the yesterday.

Kalindi’s pov:

The sunrise fall on my face making me frown, because I didn’t wanted see any sunrise in this birth. I still lay down on the bed streching my hands and suddenly, I remembered that sharp words which are sharpen then any sword or liger attack.

My eyes reddened due to yesterday’s heart brust.

I suddenly sat up noticing kala entering my chamber.

I knew he will ask why I committed suicide but, why I should tell reason? Can’t they understand my feelings through my eyes?!

I know even if I say they will blame me that’s why I decided to be quiet and ignored their eyes.

Still, isn’t it ridiculous that they’re blaming me for my own suicide attempt, wow such a great wonderful family I have got in this life which no one deserves.

Kalindi mind voice is disturbed by kala slightly pressing her shoulder.

Kalindi angrily removed kala’s hand from her shoulder. She is getting immense hurt because of her weakest and dry delicate body can’t able to tolerate any mere touch also.

Kala is amused by Kalindi’s action.

“Kala leave kalindi alone” ashwini gestures to stop talking with Kalindi, understanding her discomfort.

As kala and Ashwini left kalindi felt sigh of relief.

By Deepika