By Bhavana Sivakumar
Whenever I gain some weight, I immediately change my diet. Daily running is a habit, but the habit of eating for taste known as taste dunk is the only thing that makes me want to leave. Even if I put a tin of crackers in front of me, I will finish everything while talking. Diwali immediately comes to my mind when I say murukku. Almost two weeks before Diwali, all the work for baking the murukku starts at home. Amma would have started running frantically grinding flour and buying oil. Mother knows that me and my brothers can shoot only fifty turns or one hundred turns and it will be ten..!
We buy six or seven empty Britannia biscuit tins from the grocery store and put paper inside and store all the baked rolls in it. Murukku, seedai, laddu, samosa, rava balls, athirasam all stay at home for months after Diwali. While watching TV or reading a book, it is impossible to do without a twirl in hand, an athirasa or a piece of paper in your mouth. There is no account of how many rolls I have eaten and how many rice balls have rolled in while sitting on a chair by the window of the house and wrapped in a blanket while engrossed in a novel during the rainy season that starts after Diwali.
One of the things I love about rain is that it forces people who are running around to sit down. Kudos to the rain for pulling and sitting down the always mechanical people. Do you know how interesting it is to listen to the threatening storm warning in the months of November and December on All India Radio in the dark peak of day when there is no TV with a thrill past the fear?
When I came to talk about food, I entered the junk food and remembered the junk food twist, the twist went into Diwali and entered the rainy season after Diwali and now it is storming the article.
When I was in college in 1996, my biggest ambition was to get fat somehow. We will come and say that it would be better if we put a little bit of paint on it, and more than that, if father and mother go and sit with a wedding scene, all the relatives who come and go have nothing else to do, do they eat or not...? When I pat myself on the shoulder and ask why I look like a baby who has drunk urine, I feel ashamed. Reduce my weight by 10. It's good to talk about it. Wherever I go,feel ashamed when everyone asks me why I'm so skinny. Look at my mother with one eye. .
When all my friends who studied with me were puffing up like a balloon, why am I so skinny? It was only when I saw the advertisement of Manimegala magazine...."How skinny people can get fat..." and below that, a magazine that said, 'Thirty ways to get rid of acne.' As soon as I saw the two ways, the heroine got caught in the hands of MN Nambiar, and immediately I squeezed her hand and laughed the same way. If you want both books, place an order for Manimegala publication. It's the seventh day in my hands.
30 ways to get rid of acne.
Both the books have arrived. I could have written a better book than that one, as I was tired of trying a thousand ways to get rid of acne before reading the book. I have tried Clearsil, Ultra Clearsil, Victodermaric, Parent Lovely, Nutmeg, Sandalwood, Turmeric, etc. That book was written by me, who wrote Buddhism...? It is a separate story that the ideas given in the range of Buddha did not come to any use....
I swore to myself that I would look fat and started reading the next book. I'm already super good at Maths, eat this ounce of this, eat this ounce of this, eat this ounce of chocolate, ice cream, almond pistachio. I started losing weight because of that worry...! Zucchini has become a curry for me, so I don't remember where I put all those Manimegala brochures when my father shouted that I should eat zucchini regularly in my plate.
After getting a job in college, I was always drinking Coca-Cola and Pepsi, and I was always talking about it. Even though I understand that wanting to be fat for a certain period of time and then wanting to lose weight is an arbitrary feeling that occurs to most people, at that time it all makes us realize that it is something true.
Annie was very upset that her body was fat and I put in all the efforts for it, but at the age of 38, I go jogging every day to keep my body fit. If I need a little more rest, I will complain about eating too much, maybe I will eat less next time if I am hungry to fill my stomach....What do you want, man? Life is like a plant growing, like a rain falling, like the cycle of seasons... something happens, it changes and then something else happens....
With the understanding that nothing matters here, nothing is real here.. What is real..? The question of what is important is also traveling with me now. It is good to fantasize about something, but you don't want to sink into it and fall into any false conclusion that this is it, this is it.
Like a feather floating in the air...there is this life...it doesn't
know any direction...
left, right, up, down...flying and flying...
where am I going...?
Like waking up from sleep..
into some new world...
the end of this life will wake me up... me...?
By Bhavana Sivakumar
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