Rebel

By Aishu Rittika

I feel like

Without people

Life is pointless

All we seek

As human beings

Is very basic

Love

Connection

Relatability

The need to

Fit in.

I've always been

A rebel

And now

Today

I'm exhausted

I don't want to

Be a rebel

If that means

I'll be left alone

Trying to help

People out

In the name of

Helping them change

Have better perspectives

Has backfired on me

And today

This day

I understand

That people will be people

No matter what we do

There's only one thing

This one thing

That's always in

Our control

Our reactions

To situations

We do that

And only that.

My Fiance

Vimal and I

Are going to

Meet my mum and grandma

I feel nothing

We are at a shirt shop

He's getting

A bland grey color shirt

I am super lucky

To have

Somebody as thoughtful

As him.

It was him

Who made me call mum

This morning

And I spoke

Told her I wanted to come

She first refused

After consulting grandma

And then I gave the phone

To Vimal

He somehow convinced them

To let us come home

Today.

I am feeling

All sorts of ways

And also

Nothing.

I'm done being a rebel

I just need

A family

My family.

By Aishu Rittika