Only A Dream

By Auriah Jordan-Smith

my mother is terrified that i’m going to hurt myself

she’s terrified that i’ll devour my friends

before i get to play with them

she wonders if my lust will cause me more

isolation and anguish

and you know what?

i’m scared too.

i might never experience…

i might not get…

i’m scared

i’m a rainbow in a sea of grey and i don’t

know where the other colours are

don’t say i’m lying because you know it’s true

don’t say i’m dramatic and cynical

it’s true

and if it finds me one day on an

inconspicuous morning, i will smile and cry

and hold my dear darling in my arms

and my mother will say to me, ‘i guess

you were right’

and she’ll be happy for me

but that’s only a dream.

By Auriah Jordan-Smith