Narcissism and it's benefits

By Ratika Mishra

Narcissism and Its Benefits- Why Being a Narcissist Can be a Good Trait!

Narcissism is a pursuit of self-flattery, perfectionism, which often leads to arrogance. It is often disguised as a trait used for too self-centered individuals, for those who strive for perfectionism, and arrogant. Narcissism is often connected with toxicity as they are individuals who think highly of themselves and tend to downplay others. But what If we say that “Narcissism” is not a bad thing altogether? Will you believe it?

Well, Narcissism has its extremes, and while on a higher side of the spectrum, it can be harmful, but a controlled narcissistic behavior can be useful. Here is how a little narcissism won’t harm anyone and can be useful:

‘Good’ Narcissism is Self-Confidence

It has been found that Narcissism presents itself as a personality disorder when it co-occurs with substance use, mood, and anxiety disorders. But on the lower end of the spectrum, narcissism is a good trait. It is termed as self-confidence. A psychology professor W. Keith Campbell says narcissism might be the quality you need to clear that job-interview. As people who can boast about their accomplishments and skills perform much better at interviews than others.

Narcissists tend to Succeed more In Life

It is observed that narcissists tend to succeed more in life and do good for selves. This can be attributed to their inherent desire to stay in control and strive for perfection. Their willingness to do things their way and high-sense of self also adds to their success. They believe in self, and that is an essential prerequisite for success.

Narcissists Have Leadership Qualities

Not everyone is a leader, but being in control, getting work done, and having a high sense of self-worth are important qualities in being a leader. Narcissist possesses these qualities and often lead a group or team of people. They are not necessarily good leaders but are leaders.

Narcissists are Feared and Loved

If you believe in yourself, it doesn’t matter if anyone else does; similarly, how you treat yourself is the way you teach others how you should be treated. Narcissists have a charisma; they can easily entertain people and make them laugh. However, people equally fear them as they can go to any extent to get things done. The people whom the narcissist leads develop a love-hate relationship with him, as he gets the best out of them by driving them to work harder.

Stays in the Known

A narcissist knows what he wants in his life if he does what he loves and is passionate about- there is no holding back. He is focused and is persistent in achieving results. He uses his charm and charisma to get to the top of the ladder and, more often than not, manages to get there.

Self-Centered

A narcissist is self-centered and focused on what matters to him. He rarely listens to other people and is not interested in other people’s lives. That means no drama, no gossip- just the things that matter to him, of course. For a narcissist, all that matters is him, and thus, he thinks and does things that can lead him somewhere.

Wondering why people still call extreme narcissism as a personality disorder and how to identify one? These signs show how a narcissist behaves that makes it a toxic trait to have:

Sore Loser

Some narcissists are bullies and are often sore losers or sore winners. They might humiliate their competitor or referee if they get too competitive. They can go to the extent of abusing if they lose. The point is they feel the need to win all the time, and when they don’t, they cannot stand it. They tend to complain and have zero sportsman spirit.

Under-Appreciated is My Middle Name

They are the kind of people who are in constant need of validation and appreciation. They feel under-appreciated for the tasks they do and feel offended when they don’t get credits. They need to be appreciated at all times is high for them, and they more often than not feel that they are not given due credits for their work. They think they aren’t recognized enough and feel entitled to better things.

I am the intelligent one Here

Narcissists are often identified as the ones who think of themselves as an intelligent one. They consider their friends, co-workers, and everyone else as stupid, as more often than not, they are never wrong- at least they think so. According to them, they are the most intelligent ones among any group.

Swearing Words

Washington University Psychologists Nicholas Holtzman and Michael Strube, in a study, found that people with narcissism are argumentative and tend to curse more. They use explicit language and swearing words as they find others stupid. Their self-proclaimed high sense of worth makes them think about others as stupid.

Self-Righteous

Narcissists tend to hold their beliefs superior to others, but more than that, they value the attention they receive because of those beliefs. They consider themselves to be right at all times, and their self-righteous behavior needs acknowledgment of others almost all the time, this makes the narcissist annoying.

I can do whatever I want!

Narcissists tend to feel free to do whatever they want because- self-righteous, superior, intelligent, you know the traits. They can even act mean to others, and people should please them. They take offense quickly, and people are often saying “That’s Not What I Meant” in front of them regularly. What’s more, if they are upset other people should take due interest in appeasing to their needs.

You Hate to Feel Emotions

Harvard Medical School psychologist Craig Malkin explains that the fact they can have feelings in the presence of another person or be attached to someone or goals, present a threat to narcissists. They like to keep things practical and rational and avoid by all means feeling weak. Having emotions makes them feel inadequate, and they can’t stand the idea of being vulnerable in front of anyone.

Attractive and Better Dressed

A psychologist at Washington University named Simine Vazire conducted a study and found that the Narcissists tend to be more stylish and physically attractive. They exude confidence like nobody else, and it comes from their sense of high self-worth. All that confidence makes them more attractive and looks better.

The Speaker

Narcissists are the ones who believe in speaking, listening-not so much. This comes from the fact that they consider themselves to be righteous and the high opinion they hold for themselves. A psychologist at the University of Texas named Anita Vangelisti, in Austin, found that Narcissists prefer to keep the conversation centered around themselves. They tend to make hand movements, loud gestures and talk loudly. They show disinterest by glazing over someone when they talk. They don’t even listen to what others say and what they feel.

Always in Control

Narcissists are the ones who still like to be in control; they are the ones who feel anxious if their lives fall apart. They don’t want to be at the mercy of other people’s preferences; it makes them feel dependent. They get controlling when angry; they like things to happen as they wish, and they cannot accept it in any other way.

Narcissism like any other behavior can be good or bad depending on the amount of the trait you exhibit.

By Ratika Mishra