Mirage

By Iba Mahin

Baby! Your love is nothing,

But a beautiful mirage.

How admirably u have trapped me,

In an unreal cage.

Of emotions, love and care,

Your words are a melody to my ears,

But your infectious smile 

Don’t reach the eyes,

Are you hiding something, my beloved,

Are you luring me with the web of lies?

Ah! Your kiss so sweet,

Your voice so serene,

You struck the right chords,

Deep within me,

Yet, why I am left with an empty feel,

Like this a facade for me too see,

And reality is contrasting to what I perceive.

Sometimes, I wake up, all sweaty,

In the middle of the night,

Startled by my own cry,

As I see myself being chased by the demon,

Lusting after my blood,

Digging their fangs in my flesh,

Quenching their never ending thirst.

And I let out a shriek! 

As I wake up to the reality,

There, amidst the moonlight,

You are sleeping peacefully.

I love the way you pamper me,

With the gifts so costly,

And my friends gush over

My lucky destiny.

Yet, I want more,

I know I am selfish,

But aren’t we girls told ?

That there will come a prince,

One day,

And will provide us with everything 

We long for.

They say, love is a 

Beautiful mirage!

Agree, that is what 

I have believed in past.

But every beautiful rose is

Accompanied by undesirable thorns,

So we must cherish the angst

Love brings along.

With you, most days are so 

sunny and bright,

That I feel blinded 

By the light,

But darkness lures 

In the new moon night,

Baby, why don’t you

Understand my plight?

That I am tired of living

This Chameleon life,

And torment you give me,

As a symbol of affection,

Leaves me in pain all night.

The chain around my wrists,

Is holding too tight,

But I promise I am 

Trying to be fine,

Though prominent marks on my body,

You may not like.

Love, I am so sorry for 

Not being the way you want me to be,

Others might see as controlling,

But I know it’s your care,

That you are always around me.

I feel so guilty for looking at

The boy who might like me,

So I took your slaps as punishment,

And I tried not to complain,

And dressed plain,

Trying to be as submissive,

As a good wife would be.

I know you hate it 

When I laugh or talk too much,

So I try to be nonchalant,

And as soft spoken as I can be,

Making sure no one hears me around

I know you get angry,

When I don’t do as you please,

No! Not saying it’s your fault,

Instead me being difficult,

Justifies you,

Pushing, slapping, and hitting me hard,

As women who talks back,

Deserve every bit of the part.

I admire you giving speeches 

On gender equality,

But it’s sad that you won’t 

Follow the same when

It comes to me.

Babe! Why are you so 

Insecure about me leaving,

When I clearly told you,

That I grew up 

Watching the same in house,

A young child saw her father

Abuse her mother everyday,

Yet she would accept him each time

With open arms.

So, I know, that marriage is a sacred notion,

Of love and companionship for eternity,

And little bit adjustments are to be made,

In order to live together happily.

And with that notion,

I drew up the curtains,

To dim the light which tried to destroy my vision, 

and  admire my wrists bounded with  the heavy gold chains, 

as for an eternal bond,

we must endure the pain,

And let go of the internal chaos.

As  you are there to rectify my mistakes,

And love is tolerance, love is an art,

Love is nothing but a beautiful mirage.

By Iba Mahin