Memories Down

By Gopal Ahir

One more normal day in my life, and it seems like Mom was cooking something in the kitchen. I was in my room upstairs. A ray of sunlight from the window was falling on the painting placed on the table. The vivid colors of the painting were shinning at its best in that little ray. There was a bed with extra softness, which I never liked. My cycle hanging on the wall, bolted tightly for a few years. I made my room absolutely my kind of place: paintings, lamps, tools. Most of the time in the house I spent is in my room. It is only dinner time when me, mom and dad have conversations. Everyone is busy in their own life. The dining table was used only to make announcements and decisions. I never complained.

It was a quite evening for me in my room and I was laying down on the cold floor, embracing myself, eyes closed, mind full of restless thoughts. I felt someone near me, but I kept my eyes closed. As i am so known to even her silent footsteps. Her arms cupped me. I felt her t-shirt rubbing my face; her fragrance put a stop to my rest-less train of thoughts. I conformed her touch and preferred to keep my eyes closed. It was now a few seconds passed in silence, but this silence was a peace. Her hug kept warming me, she kept massaging my back, hug went tighter, now her body completely touching mine, legs spiraled together. Her heartbeats were slow, matching mine. I went a little lower and kissed her belly. I always love caring for her tummy. No, she doesn’t have six-pack abs but something more special than that. Soft-soft skin filled with fluffy 'she'. It always felt like touching a soft toy.

“Why you love that tummy so much?”

“It’s the perfect place for me to sleep. You are like panda.” I said in a teasing tone.

“Noooo… I am not any panda.”

I went back to her hug, that cozy hug. She moved her hand to my head with her fingers going through mine every strand of hair. She came closer, kissed my cheek, and placed her lips on mine. The universe fall to me, stars, moon, planets everything in that one moment, the precious moment, the moment which can either make you or destroy you. Is this the moment everyone is waiting for to happen in their life?

Her lips were soft, very soft, no taste, but still feels out of this world.

Her breathing was slow but heavy, her heartbeats increased a little but still at a pace. She placed her head on mine, her hair falling like the trees letting down their roots to the ground. My hand was under her body, paining, numb, but who will ruin this position. I detached my senses to the hand as it was never a part of mine. After a while, she adjusted herself to sit. Why? Why? Please remain as it is. I want to sleep for hours like this. Don’t go. Don’t go.

I also stood up, looking at her, her loose hair, her face in the dark. She seems more memorizing.

“Time to go.”

“Where, Why, it is just few minutes, please stay.” My words were mumbling.

“You know, I can’t. I want to but still I can’t.”

“Then why you came? For just few minutes?”

“I wanted to…. To see you.”

“Please don’t go, we will work it out someway.”

“There is no way, it is all gone, all vanished.” Her words met tears, and she ran towards the door.

The door closed with no sound after her. Now there was me and the empty space in which she left me. The air around me felt like not moving. We were talking and few minutes after that everything comes to an end. I closed my eyes as it is going to stop my tears, but it never worked. My first tear made its way to the floor, and everything vanished.

I opened my eyes, I was in my bed, laying there for hours, there was the sound of morning artiis from the temple. I looked for my mobile. Every alarm went unattended. Still, I was looking for what happened, and once again, the tear made its way to the ground. This time I watched it to the ground. I grabbed my mobile phone and opened her image. She was sitting in the darkroom, and Sunshine was falling on her face from a little creek in our window. Now there was no way to resist my tears from falling. I Cried. This was the last photo I clicked of her. And the next picture was of the next day of a newspaper cutting from two years back where her image was printed side by side with a car saying, “Drunk and Drive took one more innocent life in the city.”

By Gopal Ahir