Mangalsutra

By Kalp Raichura

https://youtu.be/0aq0iFFepaI

Humaari shaadi ke 3 saal baad, mere gale mein apni baahein daale , usne meri aakhon mein aakhein daal ke kaha, Bin fere hum tere, ye kahan karte the na tum kuch saal pehle mujh se? Shaadi byaah to theek hai, tumne ye jo mangalsutra ke naam pe mujhe baandha hai iss rishtey mein, ye baat ghalat hai. Agar mein isko na pehnenti to kya ye rishta manzur nahi hota?

Maine uski baaton ko kuch halke mein liya par jab maine uske mangalsutra ko dekha to uski baatein mujhe baht bhaari lagne lagi...

Intezaar

“Har acchi buri cheez bas iss intezaar ke saath khatam ho jaati hai. Bachpan mein jawaani ka intezaar, jawaani mein uss ek kahaani ka intezaar, us kahaani mein ek raat ka intezaar, us raat mein pehli mulaqat ka intezaar, mulaqaton mein kuch baaton ka intezaar, un baaton mein behek jaane ka intezaar...

Usne aane ka intezaar, uske jaane ka intezaar, Mera ruthna aur uske manaane ka intezaar, maut ka intezaar ya zindagi ka intezaar?”

Ye likha tha uski diary ke aakhri panne pe. Jab maine ye padha to mujhe rona to nai aaya par meri aakhein band ho gayi, meri saasein gehri ho gayi aur uska wo hasta hua chehra meri aakhon ke andr kisi film ki tarah chalne laga. Mere hothon par ek halki muskaan thi jo udaas thi, aaj pura ek mahina ho gaya tha usko guzre hue..

Maine aakhein kholi aur uska chehra kahi khidki se bahr udd gaya, azaad ho gaya kisi andekhe sapne ki tarah. Maine diary ka aakhri panna pehle isliye padha tha kyuki main jaan nahi paaya tha usne khudkhushi kyun ki? Aisa kya ho gaya tha...

Mein aone Dalhousie ke ghar mein betha uski diary pehli baar padh raha tha. Chai ke cup pe dhoop padd rahi thi, aisa lag raha tha wo mere saath na hokar bhi mere saath thi, jo dhoop se madad leke meri chai ko thanda nahi hone de rahi thi. Par shayad yahi galti thi meri, maine kabhi usko ek chai bana ke nahi pilaayi...

Maine chai ka ek ghut peeya aur uski banaayi har chai ka swaad meri aakhon mein se aansu bann ke chai ke cup mein ghul gaya.

Diary ke pehle kuch panno mein humaari kahaani ki shuruwat likhi thi, har wo raat likhi thi jab maine uska dil churaaya tha, har wo baat likhi thi jisko kehke maine uska dil dukhaaya tha. Humaare collage romace se shaadi tak ka safar likha tha.

Diary ke beechon beech ek sukha phool tha, maine usse chua to mujhe 2016 ka Valentine's day yaad aa gaya. Sambhaal ke rakha tha usne. Phool uss page pe tha jiss page pe humaari shaadi ka zikr tha. Usne apni khushiyan likhi thi, darr likhe the, jo mein agar pehle padh leta to shayad wo mere saath hoti.

Kuch 23 panne khaali chhode the usne, bas har panne pe ek full stop banaya tha. Unn 23 panno ke baad likha tha usne,

"Ab na sab kuch pehle jaisa nahi hai, matlab haan sab theek hai, pyaar baht karta hai wo mujhse, raat ko mujhe hug karke sota bhi hai, subh kaam par jaate hue shayad jaan bujh kr apna wallet aur gaadi ki chabi bhul jaata hai, mein bhaag ke dene jaati hu, phir wo hass ke chala jaata hai, raat ko aata hai, khaana khaata hai, din bhar kya hua wo sab bata ta hai, phir raat ko mujhe hug karke so jaata hai"

Ab na sab kuch pehle jaisa nahi hai, matlab haan sab theek hai, pyaar baht karta hai mujhse, shayad, par jata ta nahi, subh kaam par jaate hue shayad jaan bujh kar apna wallet aur gaadi ki chabi bhul jaata hai, ya shayad sach mein usko yaad nahi rehta, raat ko aata hai, khaana khaata hai, par bata ta nahi khana kaisa bana hai, din bhar kya hua wo sab bata ta hai, par ab na puchta nahi, maine din bhar kya kiya, raat ko mujhe hug karke so jaata hai, par dekhta nahi, kya mein so rahi hu? Mein usko puri raat dekhti rehti hu...

Nahi padh sakta mein aur! Maine diary ko saamne wale sofe pe feka aur apna sar pakad liya, uski diary mein mere wo saare anjaane mein kiye hue gunaah likhe the. Maine zor se apne kaano ko band kiya, mere kaano mein uski likhi ek cheekh goonj rahi thi, "Zindagi ka intezaar ya maut ka intezaar, tumne ye jo mangalsutra ke naam pe mujhe baandha hai iss rishtey mein, ye baat ghalat hai. Agar mein isko na pehnenti to kya ye rishta manzur nahi hota?"

Humein apne chahne walo se ek baar puchh lena chahiye, kaise ho? Din kaisa gaya? Sab theek haina? Chai pioge? Kabhi kabhi khamakha keh dena chahiye, haan mein baht pyaar karta hu tumse. Wo kya haina hum insaan log na dil ki baatein samjh jaate hai par shabdon mein jo feel haina, hum sab uske liye jeete hai...

By Kalp Raichura