Lockdown

By Partho Sen

In this moment I pretend,

To shuffle through my thoughts (Oh how I want this to end!),

And sum up these wild and unruly emotions,

On paper and pen,

I realize what I have come to dread,

That every act of mild contempt,

And the thoughts that arouse me every now and then,

Have magnified to such an extent,

That they have ceased to be,

Mere phenomena of pleasure and dissent,

But have rather become,

Entirely something else.

And then I find myself in bed,

Done for the day, or so I felt,

Earphones on, surroundings drowned,

And perhaps my own psyche as well,

Fear and guilt, hurt and shame,

All seemingly disappear with those musical waves,

And yet another night I spend,

Like a timid animal playing dead.

By Partho Sen