Fatherhood

By Brinda Murthy

Vishnu was out on his usual morning walk, a routine activity he maintained for his health and wellbeing. It was a warm morning in springtime with the birds chirping and many others young and old out on their fitness regime. It was also a special day for Vishnu, one that he cherished more than anything, for it had been the reason for all the joy in his life.

Reaching for his cell phone in his pocket, he squinted his eyes slightly as he unlocked the screen. Smart phones were the trend these days, but a gadget that a man older than seventy had trouble understanding it beyond phone calls and messaging, as compared to his grandchildren who knew everything of it.

Swiping his finger across the screen, he brought the phone to his ear to hear the calling tone. Three rings later, a melodic voice answered, eliciting a fond smile on Vishnu’s face.

“Good morning, papa,” said Tulsi.

“Good morning, Tulsi,” wished Vishnu in return. “Happy birthday, my dear.”

A musical laugh made Vishnu’s smile widen. It made him recall the day his daughter was born. She had been a midnight beauty, shining brightly like the moon when she entered the world with her melodic cries. It was a sound that was music to the ears and had roused tightness in Vishnu’s chest.

He still remembered it like it was yesterday - the fact that Vishnu had become a father was yet to sink in even as he had held her in his arms and watched her rosy, sleeping face. She was the most beautiful person he had seen, utterly small and delicate, but filling him with a sense of completeness so easily. It was at that moment that he had known that he would do anything he could to love and protect his precious little girl.

“How are the kids?” Vishnu asked her, thinking of the boy and girl who adored him and looked forward to seeing him during their summer vacations.

“They are doing well, papa. They’re busy playing with their friends every day and making a mess of the house,” she said, sighing softly at the end. “There’s no end to the cleaning.”

This time, Vishnu laughed. “It’s all a part of raising children. You weren’t any less naughty, I assure you. I'm sure they take after you.”

“I suppose they do,” Tulsi agreed with a hint of pride. “But it’s quite a lot of work. Aadi helps with watching the kid and housework, but he has his own things to take care of too.”

“I can understand,” Vishnu spoke with a nod.

Raising children wasn’t easy. Even if both the parents shared taking care of children and taking turns in finishing housework, fathers had the responsibility of managing finances to provide the best for his family. Vishnu had been like that too, working long hours every day. There were bills to be paid, groceries to be bought, children’s schooling to be taken care of, and so many other expenses that had to be catered to. Vishnu had taken care of everything without a complaint despite the pressure and exhaustion, but feeling quickly rejuvenated when he returned home to see the chubby smile of Tulsi. Mere minutes of playing with her and indulging in her cuddles and kisses had made him feel that all his tiredness had vanished. He was filled with enthusiasm and vigor once again.

Vishnu hung up the phone after a few more minutes of lighthearted conversation. He continued on his stroll while gazing around and the people and buildings he was familiar with. He had lived in this locality all his life and it was filled with many memories.

As he headed back home after his walk, he spotted his neighbor taking his teenage daughter to early-morning tutoring sessions. It reminded him of how Tulsi had been when she was at that age. It was a challenging time for both parents and the children, filled with college and peer pressure that had tested patience and boundaries in many things.

Vishnu’s role as a father had been the toughest during those few years. He had to be strict yet understanding, firm yet kind and gentle. The balancing act was not easy, and sparks flew every now and then from differing opinions and stubbornness. Tulsi was easily influenced by her peers, as any other teenager, and what she witnessed through the vast world of technology, and she wanted nothing more than to spread her wings and do what she wanted to without the restrictions her parents put for her. Vishnu was a man of experience though, knowing the dangers of the world that he wanted to protect Tulsi from.

He stood by her in everything, as a strong pillar that would not move under the harshest of tests and time. Tulsi was grateful to him for being a protective yet supportive father during those years; she had confessed that when she was older. She had stepped out into the great big world after that, but with Vishnu still as her shadow watching out for her at every corner, and taken her first step in success.

Vishnu recalled the day Tulsi had come home from work with gifts for him and her mother, bought from her first salary. It still elicited a beaming smile in Vishnu. In that moment, he had felt that all his efforts to be a good father had paid off – all his emotional and financial investment had helped mold his daughter into a fine young woman - kind, beautiful, intelligent, and successful. She had only progressed since then, and was now a well-respected manager in a reputed top tier company.

As Vishnu was nearing his house, he spotted a school bus stopping to pick up a few small children from their stop. They were primary school children, and one of them was crying in refusal to leave his mother to go to school. Vishnu felt a twinge in his heart, for he knew just how heart wrenching it was for the parents to send their children away to school, away from them, even if it was only for a few hours and for their education. It was all the more difficult when the children seemed so upset about the separation. The boy’s father soon joined them and picked up his son to wipe away his tears. He spoke to the boy, telling him that he had to be brave and go to school to make friends and play and learn new things. He was promised to be spent time with in the evening after his father returned from the office, and the boy was off.

Most would say that sending their children to school, especially on the first day, was the most stressful for the mother. But Vishnu knew that it was just as tough on the father as well. Fathers were often seen as a figure to instill bravery and tackle everything in life head on. It was what Vishnu had shown to the world too, assuring his wife to not worry as much as she did when sending Tulsi with other people and with many worries in mind. He had told her for days that everything would be fine, that Tulsi had to begin the first step in exploring the world, and that she would be brave and well in everything.

Secretly, he had brooded upon the same things as his wife too, though, worrying about whether his princess would still be crying or now cheerful and playing with the other children. He vividly recalled that his entire morning in the office that day had been chaotic – he had barely been able to concentrate and kept glancing at the clock every few minutes. Time had passed at snail’s pace that day with nearly no work getting done until a phone call from his wife. Hearing the cheerful voice of Tulsi after she had returned from school, excitedly telling him of the other kids she had seen and played with and the curious things her teacher had taught her had made him regain composure to concentrate on work again.

“What are you laughing about by yourself? If anyone sees you, they may wonder if you're well,” teased Vishnu’s wife as he sat down on the couch upon returning home. Geeta joined him and added, “I just talked to Tulsi. She told me you were the first to wish her for her birthday, as always.”

“Of course,” said Vishnu.

“Tulsi has planned a trip to the beach with her children this weekend. Make sure you tell your weekend meetup gang that you won't be available,” Geeta said.

“The beach, you say?”

It was another flashback for Vishnu. Just as any other child, Tulsi loved going to the beach. Making sand castles and playing in the waves that drenched the sand were her favorite things to do. She was especially excited to collect shells that had washed ashore.

Her first visit to the beach had had her looking around in wonder. The sand under her little feet, the wind in her short curls, the tumble of the waves, and the many people around were overwhelming for her, making her cling to Vishnu’s legs when they had stepped out of their car. She stuck close to him, even insisting to be picked up by him to stay where she felt safest in the world, so she could take in the world around her without worry of anything.

When she had played in the waves, walking along the wet sand with him for a while, she had let go of his hand to explore the beach on her own.

“Papa!” she had chimed soon, her eyes wide and sparkling as she held up a treasure peeking from under the sand.

Vishnu had kneeled down to her level so she could place the colorful shell in his palm. A treasure hunt had soon ensued, with father and daughter exploring the entire beach to collect mounds of shells and rocks. Sand castles were built too, big ones decorated with the shells and rocks, while Vishnu prayed to the Lord above that his daughter would forever live like a princess in a castle as grand as they had built.

And she had.

Aaditya was a man who had taken her hand, who she had chosen to hold her hand and take over the responsibility of loving, caring, and protecting her in his place. He treated her like a queen, ensuing a lack of nothing. She was with a man as good as Vishnu had shown a husband and father should be, a man who would protect and prioritize his wife and children over everything else, even though he felt he had been far from perfect in many things.

Tulsi had two beautiful children now, and Vishnu was more than happy to encourage wonder and excitement in them during every beach visit. He was not as young or strong to do the things he had done with Tulsi, but he made sure sit with his grandchildren when they built sandcastles or told him exciting stories from their imagination. He was content at the sight of Aaditya doing all the tough work, running as fast as he could behind the young ones to keep them safe while they had a grand time.

“There you go laughing again,” said Geeta, breaking Vishnu from his reminiscing.

“I just think that our kids grew up so fast, especially Tulsi,” he said. “I have so many fond memories of her and Gururaja, but it feels like so long ago. It feels like it was just yesterday that they were running to me and asking for a piggy back ride.”

“Time does fly quickly, doesn’t it? But I'm just happy that they’re both happy and well settled. What more could parents ask for?”

“You're right, Geeta. I'm glad that they are happy and well,” Vishnu said with a nod and a lingering smile.

By Brinda Murthy