Escape

By Syeda Shereen Fatima

Escape

“Can you just stop”. The girl next to my locker shouted at me.

“I’m not doing anything”. I said innocently as everyone around me stared in my direction.

“Yes, you are! You’re planning something evil in that devious mind that runs through you and your brother!” She responded while slamming my locker door.

I was not at all confused about whatever she was saying. I know where this was going.

She was blaming me for something I would never do in my dreams.

“What do you mean?” I asked quietly.

“Don’t play dumb! You know what your brother did!” someone from the few lockers down yelled.

She was drawing all the attention to us which I hated.

“Just because my brother, Nicole did horrible things to your friend doesn’t mean I do too”. Every negative emotion started to fill my body.

I want to scream

I want to cry

I want to stop this constant hurt

Ever since everyone found out what Nicole did to Amy, they all assumed that I was involved in that heinous act. They even tried to get me expelled but it didn’t work because of lack of evidence.

“I didn’t even know Nicole would do something like this. They were dating each other for a year. Stop judging who I’m because of who my brother is!”

I shoved my books in my bag and ran straight to the bathroom with tears filling my eyes.

I locked myself in one of the cubicles, muffling my cries.

I heard footsteps walking toward my cubicle.

I tried to keep the sound of my cries quiet so they wouldn’t hear me. I tried to stop crying but it wouldn’t work. They just keep talking crap all the time.

I’m tired…

“Did you just hear that?” Sarah laughed.

She kept banging on the cubicle. I brought my legs up to my chest.

“Go away! I’m nothing like Nicole”. I shouted.

“Really? Admit it already, everyone knows anyway”. Her friends joined her and they all kept banging on the cubicle.

“Admit it! Admit it!”. They all chanted.

Make it stop. Make it stop.

“I’m not admitting it. I didn’t do anything. Are you deaf?”

“What did you just say?” she sounded angry.

“That’s it.” The girl screamed.

She started to bang onto the door again, but this time it was a little harder.

Of course, luck was not on my side.

Minutes later she broke the door.

She grabbed me by my collar and started hitting me against the door.

She pulled me back roughly looking at my bloody face.

Her friend pulled out a cigarette for her.

“I find it ironic how you people say that I do evil things but it is you who is banging me against the door”. I said all muffled.

“You are a fucking bastard”. She tightened her grip around my collar.

They all started hitting me. Few girls pulled out the stuff from my bag and threw it in the toilet water.

Sarah grabbed me by my arm and lifted up the toilet seat. Her friends started hooting and cheering for her.

heartless Jerks.

“What are you doing?”

Sarah just laughed evilly.

“Giving you what you deserve”. She shoved me right into the toilet water

I tried to lift myself but I couldn’t. she shoved me in deeper as she tightened her grip.

I struggled to breathe. I moved my legs still trying to stand up but it was of no use.

She pulled me out of the water and I gasped for air.

“that’s what you get!”. With that she left the bathroom and also left me tears

Why do they have to judge me because of my brother? Why?

Just like every time I ran away.

coward asshole

yeah that's what i’m. An asshole.

I just want to get out of this place. I’m going to give them what they want. I’m tired of this. I’m a bloody coward who can’t stand for himself. I ran away.

3 months ago,

“Hey liam. Have you seen nicole?”Amy asked, blocking my way in the middle of the hallway.

“Oh hi sarah. No, he said he was sick since last night. I don't know what's wrong with him. He closed himself in his room after dinner last night”. I said while tying up my shoelace.

Amy looked a bit worried for nicole. I don't know what’s going on between these two.

But I've seen them fighting a lot these days over petty things.

I told Amy goodbye and reached my class quickly before Ms. Ellis came. She is very punctual.

As my class ended, I went to keep my books back in my locker and my friend Ross came running to me. He was trying to catch his breath as he was panting hard.

The thing he told me shook to my core. Nicole could never do such a thing. I can't trust this unless I speak with Nicole himself.

I was trying to understand what Ross was saying.

He told me that, “Nicole tried to force Amy when she went to his home to check upon him. They were having a casual conversation of which nobody knows and that conversation led into a heated argument. Nicole took things on his ego and he sexually harassed amy.”

The news spread like a wildfire in our school. Everyone was staring at me with disgust.

Later, we got to know that Nicole abused Amy quite a few times but this time it was too much.

Amy went into depression.

Since that day Sarah has hated me as she believes that I was the one who sent Amy to check up on my brother So that he would abuse her without anyone knowing.

Nicole was expelled from the school and was punished for his deeds.

Present:

After reaching home, I ran straight to my room, locking the door behind letting my tears flow down freely on my pillow.

I’m going to give them what they want.

I want to stop everything.

I want to stop this constant hurt.

To stop the voices in my head

To never again get out of my bed.

And I hate to admit it

But I want to die

An hour later, I went downstairs to see my mother setting up the dining table.

She smiled at me and asked me about my day at school, to which I replied “It was okay”

“What’s for lunch mom?” I questioned.

I ate my lunch with my parents hiding the pain and pretending to be ok.

After lunch, I told them how much I love them and how much they mean to me. Kissed my little sisters, flushed cheeks and headed to my parent’s room, locking the door behind quietly.

I started searching for my dad’s gun which after a few minutes I found it in his locker.

Just one more thing before I continue.

“I love you all” I yelled downstairs to my family.

“We love you too, sweetheart!”. I heard them say back.

This is going to hurt me. A lot.

But I must escape.

I picked up a marker and wrote on the mirror in big handwriting.

“I CAN’T DO THIS ANYMORE, I’M SORRY I NEVER TOLD YOU HOW I FELT. I’M JUST TIRED. I COULDN’T TAKE THIS ANYMORE. I’M REALLY SORRY.”

I looked into the mirror and smiled.

For the last time.

I sat down with my legs crossed on my bedroom floor. Holding our family picture in my left hand and gun to my head.

Tears trickled down my cheeks as I pulled the trigger slowly.

Bang.

“Liam’’. Footsteps of his parents were leading up to his room.

Panicking, they opened the door and were in tears.

“My baby!” the mother hugged his child closer to her heart to whom she carried for 9 months only to see this dreadful day.

They read the message written on the mirror.

“We would’ve helped you, Liam” His mother cried.

The father stared at the gun his son was holding, couldn’t accept the reality, he fell on the ground creating a puddle of tears around him.

His father moved closer to his mother, comforting her as they both grieved over the loss of their child.

A tear was half way down Liam's cheek as if he was crying along with them….

By Syeda Shereen Fatima