Different Now

By Sidhi Gupta

Lay down with a lamb, little I did know that lamb had the sharpest of teeth

Eyes up above, and we told each other little lies, hands tied together like a wreath

His words so sweet and ripe, and I looked for something to wish for, looked for a star

Up close, he’d been soft and frayed at the edges, maybe I’d only understand from afar

In my mindless skull I’d painted him out to be a man, the sort with gentle hands,

and a sweet voice, who’d hold you as you weeped, he’d be so kind and grand.

I’d been so sure of his soul, when someone would say his name I’d picture flowers and

weeping willows, little dandelions, strums of harps, the rush of water, the feel of sand.

Maybe I’d been fooled by the foul play of funhouse mirrors, and wrapped lies

Maybe he’d never meant to be mean, maybe I looked at him like he was the skies

Got too used to him being familiar, so when he let go he looked all too foreign

I’m sure he never meant to sharpen a blade, let's go back to asking questions

He never scratched but he drew blood to the tip of his dagger,

Sweeped under the tide of his boyish lopsided smile, he pushed me and I staggered

Intertwined in a way where we don’t touch, now it’s not some beautiful braid, but a

choking tangle, where my skin bruises, and I flinch further away.

Today, he’s got a new face and we don’t talk because things are different now.

By Sidhi Gupta