Depression -The Destroyer and The Healer.

By Swati Kumari

When you hear the word Depression what first image crossed your mind?

A dark room,maybe? something lying quietly, filled with emptiness .

After hearing the word “Depression”,what came to mind,yes , obviously you thought it's a situation where anyone is in a very low state of his life. And what if when I came to images ,yes your mind would create an image of a person laying down in the dark.But let me tell you it is not just this which you thought but  it's a very huge problem, no no wait not a problem it's not a sadness, a storm itself .it's a mental condition which breakdown a person from its inner core. The most unfortunate fact about depression is that it's getting so common in people. If we talk about the data or the statistics, we can find that according to research, globally, an estimated 280 million people live with depression which is approximately 4% of the world's population, with higher rates among women (5.7%) and older adults (5.9%). Now we got a little preface about depression. Let's understand it deeply. Although it's getting more common, it's not a small matter,it is developing day by day.

Starting with knowing what depression really is and how it feels, with the help of my personal experience and little theory?

So it all started with a very little overthinking,as I was an overthinker and I procrastinated too.I used to think a lot at every single subject whether those topics were necessary or not much important.day by day my procrastination increased,then the second state came where I started living alone with my own company,see being alone and having no friends is too good from having backbitching people in your life .but the things is living alone which peace and with overthinking these both are different things which led me to weak.something harsh ,bad  or u can say any traumatic experience I suffered. I got a lot of headaches due to bad overthinking.(Some of you were thinking bad overthinking? What's it ,it always bad ,my friend you are absolutely wrong, overthinking is just thinking beyond,it could be good when u put your energy in positive direction.)ok coming back to the story, during that suffering i have lots of sleepless days and nights due to these I got lots of headaches,fear, body shivering at night , anxiety,,feeling lonely, feeling betrayed you  can say all the bad feeling of the hell was moving in my mind.the stage of life where neither you like to live with that not to die. Do you know,I almost continuously didn't sleep for 21 days and due to these sleepless days and nights my father consult a doctor and he prescribed me sleeping pills but my friend thrill was that my trauma was too much bigger from the effect of medicine.yes you understood right,those sleeping pills even didn't work but a little bit i stared sleeping for one or two hour.could u imagine how bad it is how much painful.anyhow the day time ,I use to do lot of things to make myself busy so that I would not think over but when it came it night there is only darkness of aloneness ,ignorance,trauma ,my screaming heart ,those wet pillows, tears and all the images of the trauma in my mind, the shivering body with the panic attacks and no one to console because I was living far away from my family in the small dark room of my hostel,yes I mentioned dark room I used to live in that darkness with the lights off those days. The night was too hard to endure. I was not living my life I was the counting down the rest days of my life ,back if the mind sometimes I got some suicidal thoughts. Somehow this was a little trailer of how depression looks. If it has a face coming out from the story I must tell you this was my real raw personal feelings those days ,yes I can put it after some months, yes I know you are quite curious to know how I get out of it. Now from my story we understood how dangerous it is . 

If I  am not wrong we can say it is divided into three phases. Phase 1: overthinking - isolation - headache.

                    Phase 2 : insomnia - panic attack - emotional collapse.

                    Phase 3: Healing - mindfulness - spiritual path.

Now moving to your favourite point, how to get rid of this.

As I was alone so I didn't get a doctor or counseling for that so I healed myself with my own. The main lead which put me out was the path of spirituality and mindfulness. The things I do and one can follow are-1. Mindfulness: meditation 

                 2.journaling :it will help you in expressing yourself 

                 3.start doing your hobby which      keeps you and your soul happy.

                  4.setting some rules like :waking up early and doing exercises,some time with nature.

                  5. Going outside the room 

                  6.Getting outside from the comfort zone 

                  7. Follow spiritual things like reciting god names(naam jap), reading hanuman chalisa and Gita , meditating on god etc.

                 8. Affirmation.

                 9. Breaking the victim zone.

                10.working on ownself: on your own new version,your A to z transformation journey.(Never give up)

Now coming to the things you should not do.

1. Overthinking.

2. Procrastination .

3. Recalling the bad events and memories .

4. Criticising yourself .

5. Laying down purposely in a dark room at day time.

6. Not talking to anyone .

7. Purposely being alone.

8. Excessive screen time

9. Eating junk .

10. Being in the victim zone.

This was something you must know…hope you understood it perfectly.

Do you know a little positive side of this hard phase- all the hard phases of your life make you strong and a better and stronger version of yourself .(Yes I mentioned better not best ,do u know why ?, it's because in my opinion nothing is best or perfect,the best is the better we change ourselves in a positive manner) . At the end I would like to say , always keep smiling, be stronger and ready to fight all the problems of your life with a smile and positivity as life is a mixture of rewards and problems.Once shree krishna says “Parth,I have a purpose for your pain,a reason for your struggle,and a reward for your faithfulness, trust me and never give up.”

    So, last but not the least ,I will say-

   “  And maybe depression wasn't here to destroy me- it came to rebuild me into a stronger person ,this is how it justifies the journey of Depression - the destroyer to healer”.

                          Thank you!

By Swati Kumari