Darkness Is a Sickening Sight

By Aivery Schellenberg

I have moments when it’s hard 

To control the darkness inside.

The moving shadows forming what's left of my disturbed mind. 

The urges to watch it all burn, 

Coughing up my dirty blood.

When my muscles begin to shake

By untamable rage.

Every spoken word is dripping with sin.

Yet I clear my throat and

Refuse to be pulled away.

Seduced by a feeling of utter madness.

Ravishing in the dangerous tides

That willingly sinks me beneath its layers.

Where the world is no longer color

But shades of grimacing black.

Soothing a withering soul and a dying heart.

A condition I’ve long accepted.

Slowly growing accustomed to tittering on the edge. 

These moments last for seconds or hours or days,

But by the end I manage to find my spark of light.

Imposed upon my will and stubbornness, 

To open up my clutched fist, 

To breathe in ragged air.

To allow myself to grab on to the rope attached to sanity.

Biding my time till my cycle starts all over again. 

By Aivery Schellenberg