Your Unaccounted Departure

By Indratapa Routh

Don't bother asking if I'm alright

I think you may have lost that right.

Somewhere among broken vows,

Unasked questions plaguing me,

Over miles of distance, self inflicted,

That stretch across us now,

I doubt our voices will reach each other.

So don't waste your breath,

Or worry what will be of me.

For concern without assistance,

Is awfully futile, you see.

Don't criticize, knowing fully well

What could have been, what still could be.

I was at your door, counting the moments

Till you'd emerge and see me.

I couldn't wait for you to show me the world

Like you had always promised.

"Of course my love," you had taken my hand,

Promised to teach, to guide and fight–

For me, with me. Till the end of time.

So I had skipped home, let sunlight in

Hoping to get wise with you by my side.

How could you have left me halfway?

The next day you had come,

and the day after that,

However on the third you ran home early.

On the forth, I implored

Peeking in from your window

"Won't we go out to explore?"

"Not today," you had refused,

Said you had other stuff to do.

Kicking at stones on the long way home

I had walked into a dark room.

Tomorrow couldn't come soon enough.

It appeared though, that didn't help.

Very next day, tale remained the same.

As time passed by, I kept standing outside

Pleading and begging for you to help me learn;

You wouldn't even spare me a second glance!

Now that we're both running free in the universe

I am struggling to survive.

In view of the fact that you were my world,

But you didn't even let me inside.

Now if we meet somewhere on the streets

Don't be shocked by the rain drenching me

Or the thunder burning me up alive.

Don't preach how I would not have bled

Had I ducked from the dogcart dashing by.

You had the time, you had my will,

But you had chosen to not keep your word.

Today I don't know social rules

You berate me, asking 'why?'

As if you don't know, in sepia tones,

Ages ago in my mind's eye,

There were you and I.

Rubbing rocks together to spark a light,

Grinning ear to ear, heads held high.

Since you left, you've spoiled wisdom for me.

I don't hum anymore the nightingale's melody.

So leave, straight away, don't worry about me.

I think you may have lost the right.

By Indratapa Routh