Twist of Fate

By Kalpana Rangan

Three days had passed since she heard the news and today everything was over. "Is it Mrs. Arun Raman speaking?" the caller had asked. It was quarter to twelve in the night. Why this call at such a time? Slowly and haltingly she answered. "Yes, --- I am Soumya Arun." "Ma-am, sorry to disturb you at this time of the night. But --- we had to give the news. Your husband met with an accident. It was a head on collision. He was rushed to the hospital but --- they couldn't save his life. We are sorry." The receiver slipped out of her hand. 

      Half an hour later, she found herself in bed. Their family doctor was checking her pulse. When she opened her eyes, he said “Relax, you need to be calm.” Her son, Vijan was looking at her anxiously. "Ma, are you OK," he said and squeezed her palm. Was it a nightmare? Before she could ask, Vijan was crying. "Mom, we have to be brave. Don't worry we are with you." "Then it is true. What I heard on the phone was true. Oh god, how did this happen?" she wailed. Vijan came and hugged her. Then he blurted out. "He was on his motor bike. While driving down from Changla Pass to Leh a truck had hit his vehicle. It all had happened too soon ---"      What followed in the next three days also seemed surreal. Images of his body being brought and laid down; Relatives pouring in and consoling her; her sons lifting the pier and the hushed silence following the funeral; the chant of the priests, the garland over the framed picture of Arun. The rushed activities floated through her mind. Was it all over so soon?

     After being together for 30 years she was single all over again. Her senses seemed to have numbed. From morning friends and family members were pouring in to offer condolences. She saw them with open eyes, heard their soft, consoling words but could hardly react. Was she too tired or drained of all emotions? Whither is fled the visionary dream? Where is it now, the glory and the dream? Words of the nineteenth century poet floated in her mind. She could not even recollect the name of the poet. But it seemed to connect with her state of mind at that moment.

      She was in her late twenties when she married Arun. Her parents had been worried. They had been looking for a match for her for the last five years. She had completed her graduation and post graduation too! Wheatish in complexion, small in built with a pleasant face she was a mangalik. Why did the planets, the stars and their position decide the fate of a girl, she often wondered? If horoscopes matched, the boys refused. Her parents were frustrated but she was happy the way she was. She had started teaching in the Kindergarten section of a school. It was a pleasure to spend time with children.

     The only child of her parents, she was brought up with loving care. In fact, she was pampered though her mother was strict when it came to health, hygiene and manners. She was a well-behaved child, cheerful and friendly. In school too, she was liked by her teachers as she was a good combination of intelligence and talent. She was good in sports, art, debating and academics. She got a few prizes every year and would proudly display them on the mantlepiece. Her father would show it off to friends and family members. "Look at those trophies, they are Soumya's. She is really talented," he would add with pride. 

     As she crossed her teen years and entered her twenties, her parents started their search for a groom. "What is the hurry dad? I am just 24, " she pleaded. "It takes time to find the right one," they said. Also in Brahmin homes in South India, fair complexion was an asset and grooms especially US based ones would pick the best of them as a trophy! Soumya's dusky complexion was a worry to her parents though they were confident that she would get a good match at the right time. They did truly believe that marriages are made in heaven. 

    In fact, she had got bored of dressing up in Kanjeevaram silks to impress the boys whenever they came to view her. She would serve snacks, talk sweet nothings and wait for their verdict. That evening 30 years ago too she had to dress in fineries. But Arun was different. He had lost his wife in an accident and had given up on marriage. He was in his late thirties. However, since his parents had insisted on his meeting the girl, he had consented. 

     As they began their conversation, suddenly the barrier seemed to fall down. She was confiding in him and he too was relating his past. She had listened to him with rapt attention. "Oh god, I am sorry," she had remarked. He had looked at her and said, "Well, that was my destiny. Perhaps I should move on." I wish I could help him to forget his past, she thought. When he left she knew she had found her partner. Anyway, she was not sure of his decision. Will he or won't he? She got the answer the next day. Yes, he liked her and was ready to get married to her. 

     They were engaged within the week and married two months later. Everything had happened very fast. She was in a daze all through the wedding. It was a hectic schedule and she was exhausted when it was over. Then she had to pack for their honeymoon. He had suggested Darjeeling. For her any place was heaven to be with her loved one. So off they went to the hilly town. Three blissful days and then they got back to their home in Mumbai. 

     Life for a new bride is bound to be euphoric. However, saying goodbye to freedom and independence to take on full responsibility was a task. Arranging the house, administering the servant, planning the budget, buying provisions, making meals, seemed to be a twenty four hour job! Before Arun returned back in the evening, she would hurriedly finish the day's chores including cooking and dress up to receive him. Then they would exchange notes and go out for a walk before meals.

     She enjoyed her new role as a home maker. Housekeeping was as tough a job if not more than a bank, teaching or office job. Here you had to keep the house clean, supervise the servant, cook meals, look good and make your home a welcome haven for your loved ones! It kept her on her toes. And she was delighted when she received compliments for decorating the house or for making a tasty dish. When Arun said, "Wow, the flower vase looks nice," or "the cauliflower sabzi tastes good," she felt she had won a prize!

      Three months later she discovered she was in the family way. How she had waited with bated breath to break the news to Arun! And he was ecstatic. “Wow, that’s great news. You deserve a gift for this,” he had said and next evening he brought her flowers and a clutch purse When she had shared the news with her parents they too were overjoyed. “You couldn’t have given a better news,” her father spoke. Her mother cautioned, “Be careful. Don’t walk too fast and avoid taking an auto. And yes, eat proper meals!” Arun would take her out and pamper her with cutlets, pizzas and ice creams! 

     Then he had to go abroad on an official tour that he had been postponing. "It is only a matter of five days and then I will be with you and yes, I will bring you lots of chocolates!" he said hugging her. Four days had passed. In fact, she was so busy that she did not notice how time flew by. She had to go for her checkup. Then the household chores, bank work and shopping for the kitchen. On the fifth day she received a call. Perhaps it was Arun calling before his return.

     "Is it Soumya? I am Gaurav here. Well ---, this morning Arun complained of abdominal pain. He was taken to the hospital. He is better. He may be there till tomorrow. So only day after he will return back. I will keep you posted." "But can I speak to Arun?" she asked anxiously. "Let me check with the doctor and get back to you." The next day Arun called. His voice sounded feeble. "I am OK. I will be back tomorrow. Then I will meet the doctor. But don't worry, you take care," he assured her. 

     He returned a few days later. The doctors in North Africa had recommended that he go for a check-up in Mumbai. Arun was in pain till he met the doctor on Friday. The doctor checked him and sent him for sonography. All the other tests were also taken. After a week, he had gone to the doctor without her but with a friend. "All these visits to the doctor will only tire you. After all you have to think about yourself. And finally, whatever will be will be!" he said smilingly trying to cheer her up.

     Late in the evening when he came back he looked pale. She looked anxiously at him and then sat down by his side. He took her hand and slowly said, "Sorry, it was what I was dreading. It is cancer but it is in the first stage. The doctor assured me that I will be fit and fine once the chemo sessions are over. I will keep taking the medicines regularly, follow a strict diet and exercise. No more of partying or drinking. I think I have had enough of it. This is one way of god telling me to improve and keep fit."

     Tears rolled down her cheeks. He wiped it. "You have to be brave at least for our child. Thank god we detected it on time. Let us take it as a challenge. I will do everything to overcome the disease. If there is a will there is a way!" She pressed his palm. "Yes, we will fight it out." "Now, let's have food. I am hungry and I don't want you to starve either!" he laughed aloud.

     Then started the doctor's visits, chemotherapy sessions and counselling. Watching Arun grow bald and admirably bearing his pain and treatment sank her heart but gave her hope. Very soon his hair grew back. Arun started attending office and also his tennis sessions. It was like before. Of course, he had to take his medicines and visit the doctor every month. She never knew how time flew by. Did she have morning sickness at all? She was not sure. The baby was due in a week's time. The doctor said all was well.

     Arun was with her all through her delivery. It was a boy. How ecstatic Arun was! She was too exhausted even to react. But she was relieved and extremely happy. Their little bundle of joy had arrived. A new chapter in their life had started. The next few months were hectic. Feeding the baby, changing the nappies, supervising the servant and snatching sleep in between. Arun had started going on tours again.

     A year passed. On his routine check up the doctor detected a growth. it had spread but could be contained. Another surgery and again caution. Why had god to test them when they were happy? Should they go through trauma before realizing happiness? Arun recovered fast and his life was back to normal. They were a happy threesome. Picnics, get-togethers and weekend outings. It was fun.

     Vijan was born two and half years after Raghav. Their family was complete. They had gone to the Balaji temple in Tirupati. Soon Raghav was admitted to a school and Vijan was walking. Then it happened again. The doctor had recommended another surgery. He was under the scalpel again. Some more medicines and life style changes. God, how long should we be on tender hooks? Will the Democles sword forever hang over their heads?

     Years passed. Arun was fine and leading as active a life as any other person. On his sixtieth birthday, they had a big party where his friends, colleagues and family members cheered him. In the office, there was a grand farewell party. Cake was cut, music was played, emotional speeches were given and then a beautiful cuckoo clock with wood and silver work was gifted to him. He retired from service, settled down in his native home and was indulging in his favourite pastimes; tennis, cycling and exploring unknown places. 

     Raghav had completed his engineering and also his management course and employed in a reputed bank in their branch in Singapore. Vijan had just completed his engineering course. She was working in a school close by. Life was as comfortable as it could be! Then Arun expressed a long cherished desire to go on a motorbike trip to Ladakh from Delhi. Soumya was apprehensive. "Wouldn't it be too tiring and risky? You have to drive down rocky hills," she stated.

     "That's adventure dear. The thrill you get while driving on the trans-Himalayan territory is surely to be felt to be believed. I wish I could take you but two people on a motor bike, on a hilly terrain, will indeed be too risky!" She didn't have a mind to quash his enthusiasm. And unless he accomplished his task, he would keep thinking about it. "Ok, you can go but you should keep calling me every now and then." "Sure, I will. Don't worry. I will take care of myself. And I will bring back loads of photos of mountains and monks and apricots especially for you!" He laughed aloud. 

    The next few days he was busy planning for the trip. Train ticket to Delhi, hotel booking in Delhi, Srinagar and Leh and the packing. "The suitcase I will keep in Delhi and take only my backpack on my road trip," he said. She helped him pack. "Try on your helmet," she had told him. That morning they had their last meal. She had cooked his favourite dishes; sambar, avial, beans curry and tapioca chips. 

     Twice in a day he would call her and speak to her for half an hour. He would tell all about the day's journey and what he saw. The last time he spoke he was euphoric about the barren beauty of Ladakh and the kaleidoscopic views of the mountains. "I have clicked over a hundred photos but nothing can compensate for the real views of the heavenly hills. It is as if I am in the abode of Shiva, the Himavat Parvat. I feel sad that I will be leaving this terrain this evening."

     He never left the terrain. He got knocked down while heading towards Leh. His long cherished desire was fulfilled but he was no more to relive his memories. His motorcycle along with his suitcase and backpack were returned when they brought his body. His camera was intact and when Raghav downloaded the photos, she could see how happy he was. It was as if he had merged with the hill scene.

     All these years she had lived with the fear that cancer may take its toll on him. But he survived the disease and proved that one can conquer any illness if they had self-will and the desire to live. He had been called to speak on many Cancer awareness programmes and was also awarded for being a successful and confident Cancer survivor. "Be positive and you can overcome any disease. Life is for living and live it to the full," he had said. He lived life to the full. He lived on when the fear of death lurked over him but died when he least expected it!

By Kalpana Rangan