The Twisted Tale Of My Love

By Radhika Sumanam

Thousands of years ago,

my life’s story was ready,set to go

everyone knows in general

here I tell the details several

Born last in a lot of sisters,

always treated as a sore blister

being born with physical deformity,

often a target to people’s animosity

being called by names galore

sometimes a ‘demon’, a ‘hunchback’ or an ‘ugly whore’

my life was far from fine,

without any fault of mine

enduring hardships day in and day out

tried to live life as gay as I could, without any doubt

Being a neat freak,

my cleaning abilities were sparklingly unique

this news spread like a raging forest fire,

upon reaching the Queen’s residence,I was put on hire

I was happy with this minuscule of fortune

seeking happiness,I would even travel to the moon

polishing the palace chambers white and bright again and again

gaining the Queen’s favour was there on the brighter side of this bargain

One day while I was cleaning the Queen’s chamber

a vivid memory to remember

while the Queen was on her regular walk along the curvy balk

in her regal costumes and a crown to add glamour

from outside,I suddenly heard a clamour

rushing outside,I found the Queen lying on the floor

overhead,a hanging awning leaning over like a branch of sycamore

I rushed to the Queen’s aide,

helping her to the bed side

as it is, she was fully pregnant

with her due date almost present

immediately, I called for the royal doctor

to inform the King’s court, I ran a hector

That day altered my life permanently

as if fated by the gods themselves more importantly

I became a mother like

to the tiny little tike

leaving the beautiful baby princess in my care

the queen left quietly to travel to nowhere

For the first time in my life, I understood the word called ‘love’

my heart stopped as if I had consumed foxglove

I poured all the love I had,in caring for the dainty doll

though loved by all,

she especially loved me fondly

for the first time,I loved the feeling of being loved,dearly

this love entered my life unexpectedly

and I vowed to protect it with my life fiercely

My doll grew into a beautiful lady in the quickest tempo,

outsmarting all contemporary fellow

she mastered all household chores as it was mandate to a princess

also she had an upper hand in archery than many a princes

she understood the many nuances of the politics too

if the hour needs she could even duel two on two

that is my baby doll Kaikeyi

Many kings tried to gain my doll’s hand in marriage

but she was adamant in rejecting all,much to my disparage

one day a king from somewhere south,visited the palace

I didn’t like him, as I sensed him as an old callous

much to my chagrin, my doll fell in love with him at first sight

I tried to steer her away,as the King came along with his Queen on his right

she was enamoured by this man in grey

and forced her father to let her be his bride without any delay

inspite my initial reluctance, my mother’s love gave in to her marriage decision

the marriage it self was a austere affair later followed by a grand procession

that day,I promised to her and to myself,I would throw my life away

to protect her and her heirs from all the dangers on their way

I accompanied my doll to her husband’s house

which was a humongous chaos

either because of its people or because of it’s enormity

I was worried with a necessary abnormality

“how would my doll survive in this concrete jungle?”

without being entangled in the palace’s political triangle

my doll’s husband,as I would always refer him such

married again, another princess of another kingdom, to worsen my doll’s clutch

he only had a daughter with his first wife

and in very much want of male heirs,he was ever in grief

One day he heard of a powerful ritual, which would confer him with male heir

if performed with wife by his side,and a fervent desire

on an auspicious day, he sat with all his three wives

in front of sacred fire, surrounded by priests singing verses of hyms in fives

sudden blinding light appeared at the end of the ritual

and a bright halo surrounded the husband and wives individual

as if the time stopped at that moment

I wouldn’t know for how long I was stuck in that component

after I regained my self conscious

I saw my doll as happy as obvious

as I asked her the reason

she replied she would be mother by next summer season

The start of summer, we were busy with babies cooing

and swing’s rhythms infusing through the great hall booming

beautiful princes, four in toto

but my doll’s son was the most handsome,like a bright red tomato

though the eldest, Ram by name is favoured by all

I’ve always felt my little Bharat is a better visual to enthrall

as their age for formal studies is reached,

they were sent to sage Vashista’s Ashram, to be preached

though I was always ridiculed by himself

yet,I dearly missed my Bharat, more than Kaikeyi herself

After a decade of studies in forest,

all of them returned to the palace, as they reached their crest

I noticed a peculiar thing among the brothers

as I follow them everywhere, though not as a bother

while Laxman follows Ram always

Shatrughn follows Bharat all days

though Laxman and Shatrughn are twins

yet they are always with their elder brothers in thick and thins

One fine day, Ram and Laxman were sent along with sage Vishwamitra to offer them protection

I was very happy with a day of such perfection

I always felt Ram as a hindrance to my Bharat’s growth

yet neither my doll nor her son saw even an ounce of truth

after many months of their leaving,

I was happy into believing

that Ram might never return

then my Bharat would be the future king for certain

One fine day, a messenger arrived from a small kingdom

that Ram had fulfilled a swayamvar ritual, with wisdom

they were to travel immediately for the marriage ritual

all the four brothers were to be married to four princesses from that kingdom, in the same ritual

initially the king was displeased with the message

later, after tete a tete with sage Vashishta, he left happily,to travel with his whole entourage

all the Queens were left behind in the palace

to welcome the newlyweds later,with holy water chalice

With the newlyweds return

the palace proceedings took a new turn, not being taciturn

I liked Bharat’s bride

but my loyalty fumbled for a second, seeing Ram’s bride by his side

I felt a magnetic attraction towards Ram’s bride

yet I subtly tried to hide

she was humble yet strong

I was cautious not to look at her for a second long

multiple emotions swirled in my cortex

co-existing like a beautiful vortex

Sita’s face was imprinted in my mind

without any tussle, that scene was always on rewind

Time flew by in a blink of an eye

few years went by

on a fine morning, I heard a gossip from king’s court

struggling for breath, heart being in contort

I ran at my best to Kaikeyi’s abode

with tearful eyes, croaked voice, I could only bode, without any word

looking at my helplessness, she was worried

gulping some water I tried to tell her unhurried

that Ram was to be bestowed as crown prince, the very next day

she was surprised initially, later cried in gay

I tried to assess the situation

whether she understood whatever I told her, curbing my frustration

I repeated the information

she replied with a smile in jubilation

I was perplexed

with her behaviour,which seemed complex

I told her again

that Bharat was not the one being crowned, but in vain

I asked her, was she,so happy about her lifelong mockery?

or was she happy about her son’s lifelong slavery?

contemplating about what I said

with her long black jewel studded mane, she played

Many hours passed in her contemplation and my explanation

after my persistent elucidation, she came to conclusion with a resolution

she said she would request for a private audience with the king

I was as relieved as though I drank water from a natural spring

after an hour long talk

I saw the king in tears, when I entered her chamber,neither able to talk or walk

Dasarath aged over a decade in this hour’s span

he looked lost like a deadman

Upon asking Kaikeyi about the happenings

while dazzling with happiness, she said with subtle cackling

Bharat would be the next king,instead

Ram would be going to forest for a fourteen years span, as said

by the king’s ordinance

to be followed without any ifs or buts, in accordance

while Kaikeyi continued with her monotone

why Sita flashed before me, unbeknown

I surely felt proud for setting things right!

all that followed was unnaturally quiet

without any fuss Ram denounced throne and left for forest

Sita and Lakshman following Ram was a surprise at the least

while Bharat and Shatrughn were away then

I wondered how Bharat’s reaction would sway upon his return

Dasarath’s health deteriorated fast

all the prayers done for his health were in waste

he died in grief for his son

and I felt partly responsible for this sin

as Bharat came back steadfast

and knew all that had passed

he immediately sent for me

and almost smashed me to death like a flea

if Kaikeyi didn’t stop him at right time

I would have been under a layer of fine grime

After being banished from the palace half dead

I walked along the shore filled with brambles, covered in red

I roamed anywhere

with the lifeless body that I carried everywhere

I lost track of time, for how long I was living

without any soul left for loving

yet I survived in shadows

marooned in faraway meadows

I am manthara, this was the twisted tale of my love

always tried to understand how,

loving and caring for a person was crime

eons ago, my body was sublimed

yet my question remains unanswered

and I’m only remembered for hatred as a standard

By Radhika Sumanam