The Space Where Your Love Was Supposed To Be.

By Dr Manasi Naphade

I tried filling it with anger,

And felt my heart burn with pain and my body getting filled with violence.

My body was at war with itself

I tried filling it with hate.

I filled it with heaps, mountains of hate.

Which just seemed to disappear in thin air just seeing that freckle on right side of your cheek

I tried filling it with grief

A grief so profound, that it became an inherent part of me.

It accompanied me everywhere I went.

It increased by multitudes when I saw you with her.

I tried filling it with indifference.

My own body betrayed me.

When I could remember everywhere that you touched me.

I tried filling it with distraction

This plan seemed to work so well

Untill one day it didn’t.

And every feeling that I had been avoiding just came back with to me with all it’s intensity

I tried to filling it with self love

Step by step it was becoming easier to breathe.

A small wildflower started growing on the barren land I had manured with hate, anger and grief for so long.

I never realised when the small wildflower turned into a full fledged forest.

How come I started loving myself more than I had ever done before.

By Dr Manasi Naphade