Seeing Through These Clouds

By Arunanshu Chatterjee

Its not something I give much thought about. I am a normal human being, as normal as you could get without being boring. I have a few quirks that make me stand out. Gets me some attention wherever I go. Though I cannot fully say that I appreciate the attention always. The source of my quirk are my eyes. No, they are not exotic. They are not some fancy colour-purple, red, green, grey. No, my eyes are a perfectly regular brown. You could see that if you looked hard enough. But no one bothered to. They could not stand looking at my eyes. All this is for one simple reason- I am legally blind. No, I am not completely unable to see. At best, the world is a blur of colours to me. The doctors said my eyesight can never be restored.  That is not so uncommon, you may think. Well, here is the fun fact- I am seventeen. Yep, at the ripe age of sweet sixteen I got cataracts. Just a little more than a year later, I am reduced to a sunglass and a cane. I got to school in this condition. The principal was generous enough to allow me to school with all the help he could give. The teachers and my friends have been extremely helpful to me. It took some time to adjust to everything, or well, not seeing everything. I cannot see anyone, but I can feel their looks of pity and sadness when I stumble over something or have trouble with communication and conversation. I smile at their way, or what I think their way is, and reassure them that everything is alright. Yes, feel incompetent and guilty and I see myself as a burden sometimes. I can’t help it. To my parents, my sister, to my schoolmates, my teachers, to everybody, I am a bit of a burden, even if no one tells me that. I had to get used to it. However, the part of this is not to wallow in your own grief but to look forward to everything. I had to quit tennis. I was sad, but then I realised there was a lot I could still do, even with no vision. I took up debate and declamation. Now I am quite proficient at it. I strive everyday to become what I can with my hindered sense. There are some things I have to rely on others for the rest of my life, but I try to be the best at everything I can do myself. My impaired vision makes for a lot of good, healthy fun for me. There was this one time I asked my teacher the same question multiple times because I simply could not grasp whatever he was trying to say. He got fed up and yelled, “Can’t you see? Its so simple.” Almost immediately though, he stopped. I could hear the whole class wait with bated breaths for my reply. I smiled at him, “No sir, that is exactly the problem. I can’t see it.” Then proceeding to laugh at my own humour. It was a tough job to get back to normalcy in my school, but now almost everybody has accepted my condition and grown to normalcy with it. Something I find very refreshing. My teachers also do not treat me as someone very special but there is a bit of an extra help for me always. These clouds may cover my eyes, and I may hide them from the world, but these clouds are not going to stop me from looking at my future, my bright colorful and very clear future. 

By Arunanshu Chatterjee