Palpitations

By Malik Hampton

So, what brings you in today? The doctor asks

And I reply, I’ve been Turning ”let’s go our separate ways” conversations into “together we’ll find a way” Conversations

I only lose a step when I lose concentration, and me losing that is like the hezi god losing his hesitation 

I take the ions and tie them together like my assets suffered from sequestration 

At times the pen is a burden to my heart like these palpitations

Then other times it’s the relief that comes after a rainy day, with the aroma that can be so rehabilitating 

When I review my statements i review the words placement, perfection or lack thereof makes my heart flutter, and the pressure can make these lines feel like explanations

Pinky and the brain today is like yesterday and the following are the same

While tracing my mind for some substance I remember our time spent in the galleria influenced by a substance 

and doctor, I had to delete the picture of our silhouette, knowing me and her would never again share any substance

My heart could use some respite, And here I am, facing the facade and all the damage it’s been causing

I fear only being seen, being truly seen and that’s because i’ve always been a foot in and a foot out, and i only got out what i put in but Maybe that’s what I needed

the realization that destruction was all I put in

And what did I get out? 

these voids in my soul? 

Skipped beats of a heart? 

Potentially being a father or the many nights i spent weighing the odds?

Or marinating on what not loving myself has truly cost?

So doctor, you tell me, out of all of these, Which, most burdens my heart?

By Malik Hampton