Love At First Sight

By Yashika Taneja

She grew up playing

On trees and swaying

In a small village far away

In the land of Himalayas.

She studied some and well

In her parent’s dwell

Learnt to write some English

And a few words of Takri too

Her laughter drew men

From far and near of kin

She did not get much choice

In making future for herself

She married in a few years

Left her mother with wailing tears

And soon her eyes filled

With the water from the smoke

That arose while cooking

From the burning fire

Of her laughter’s death pyre.

She served her husband fine

Never pouted or whined

She cooked and cleaned the house

Washed the laundry too

She provided him warmth in bed

The sole purpose of man to wed

She bore him also a son

With whom she could never connect

She also farmed in the fields

Good results the soil would yield

She grew into a fine woman

Carrying on her marital duties

She took out the cows to graze

And milked them in morning haze

Fed her family very well

Gave them all she had to give.

Her parents soon forgot her

Or did she forget them?

While she debated all the time

Is this how will come the end?

Her only time of living

Was when the cows were grazing

She would dream of a joy

That was never to be found.

One such afternoon slow paced

Her heart went on a sudden chase

While she sat leaning on a rock

She fell into a dream

Went to sleep broken and sweet

Not caring for anything else

In the dream she was falling

Into a water full well

As her foot slipped off the balance

She heard a sudden click.

A click of tongue guiding

The sheep into a herd

Her eyes opened to the face

Of a beautiful Gaddi man

Near and far so many sheep

Surrounded him from all the sides

A lean stick and a young sheep

He was carrying in his hands

Wearing the long traditional white

Turned beige from the dust of lands

The colourful topi also adorned

The shock of hair peeping jet black

She was again about to doze off

When his gaze locked into hers

The first glance was so possessed

Of all the unknown that was to be

She knew she wasn’t at her best

No colours played on her skin

Neither the trinkets adorned her

The beauty was all but bare

Growing conscious of the looks

That gazed at her uninterrupted

She shifted uneasily here and there

Her eyes, but they revisited

She couldn’t understand as much

That why the heart beat fast?

Why was there a flutter inside

Which she now felt at last?

The grey eyes seemed to call her

Unspoken and aloud

She heard it all around her

Though there was no sound

The smile that played on rough lips

Was what her dreams had been

She heard a thousand loving words

A glimpse to be his queen.

A stirring also rose in her

That she had long forgot

From somewhere deep inside of her

It sent a shiver through her cores

Hadn’t she felt the same

On the night she had waited

For her husband to run his hands

On her face and touch her lips

But it hadn’t so happened

He hadn’t bothered with her face

It took some pain and jerks

For him to put her in her place

This stirring had fainted that night

It had been smothered alive

By the weight of his pushing body

Crushing her down on her bedside

He had neither known her pains

Nor had he heard her stifled cries

Her beauty was all in vain

He never knew her for his woman wise.

Now it seemed this lanky man

Was diving into her insides

And pulling out the best of her

That had ceased to be alive

Should she keep looking at him?

Should she not resist?

Fight the wife and mother in her

Who did not really yearn to be?

It would be some more time

For the sun to go down

And along with the sun will set

The flurry in her heart and body

The sheep surrounded her too

Enveloping her in his existence

Why did she feel the urge

To give in opposed to resistance?

She looked for her cows

They were nowhere to be seen

This new vision that she now saw

Had no place for old dying sheen

He walked towards her promisingly

She knew he would hold out his hand

To take her along with him

To his journey on this land

She shifted herself unsure

Like a sheep who still couldn’t be on fours

Staggering left her the thought

Of the dream that noon had brought.

As he advanced in her direction

She looked out for another distraction

That in her heart she knew

Would never come to her rescue

She knew something about his kind

They graze the sheep and live fine

There is no one home yet all earth

Would be hers to make it worth

It felt that the pull was so strong

To resist it would be oh so wrong

But what about the cows she brought

Without whose milk there would be a draught

In her kitchen and her home

Without her where would they roam?

She wondered, rather had a doubt

Was it even hers to call?

Or would she die a wife and mother

That would be easily replaced by another.

Now she had a choice

For once in her life

No doubt came to her

About the Gaddi lover

Who had not yet uttered a word

But his eyes had spoken a thousand thoughts

And in the temple of her heart

She had spanned a love yarn!

Closer and closer he stepped

Towards the heart that wildly leapt

At the intoxicating stink

From the sheep and gaddi mink

Bleating heard from all the sides

Two pairs of eyes on a wild ride

Driven by two beating hearts

Wickedly who played their parts

He came so close she could see no more

Anything else but his eyes that roared

Like a lion on a chase

About to grab a sheep on graze

Once he would grab her being

His hunger would soon be fleeing

She smelt his breath on her face

It smelt so alien to her race

That only lived in a make believe world

Where her dreams she would never unfold

He touched her with a smile wide

That promised her a wild ride

If she chose to go with him ahead

On the journey that she had never had

On any night of her marital bed!

Oh she realised with a zap

When his hand gave hers a tap

That it was the moment to decide

What did she really want in life

Was it being the wedded wife

Of the farmer who would never know

How she smelled or if she ever felt?

Or was it being a wild companion

Of this gaddi man’s unlawful union

That would not raise her in world’s eyes

But then did she really care about that vice?

He held out his hand

With a question in his eyes

To take her on an endless journey

Filled with unending desires burning!

What would she lose?

A husband who didn’t know her

A son who she couldn’t recognise

As a part of her own rise

A home or a house not yet sure

A life that was unending bore

Everyday was full of chores

That killed her passion’s roars.

What would she gain?

A man who wanted to know herself

Not knowing her stature or her wealth

He would make her a part of his life

Whether his lover or his wife

Did the name matter to her anymore?

She who now felt less like a whore

She was not bartering for food and milk

Now she would get grasses feeling like silk

There would be sheep all around

Pleasant incomprehensible bleating sound

Hookah nights and lots of drinks

Lots of dancing in human rings

Dogs that would protect her from the wild

Astray animals with closed eyes

Hills of all heights- high and low

Where the cool and hot winds blow

That would play her face and hair

And that brought on a decision clear

She would go ahead with the dream

Leave the cow’s milk and its cream

For the wool from the sheep

That would never make her weep

And the man who desired

Her love and her body’s fire

Whatever the life was offering now

She would gladly accept with a bow

Leave behind the gory past

That killed her dreams and bled her heart

She would now live for herself

Needed no mirror set on a shelf

The rivers clear and pristine

Would add to her beauty’s sheen

And she would run like a wild

Nature’s very own free child.

She opened her eyes

And held his hand

With a promise to be one of theirs

In their magical clan

That lived on and among the hills

But no address to name the bills

And the joy in her heart she bore

To lose herself to the core

She would now be in real terms

A woman who would come!

Right ahead and cry with a wham

While she loved a gaddi man!!

By Yashika Taneja