Fantasy Bonding

By Amira Wells

Not understanding this feeling I have has become flustering.

One day, I’m okay and living life.

Others, I miss your presence and the way things were.

You were starting to become something to me.

Something that I never had before.

Something that was unusual but felt good.

Things felt different, and I thought those things were fine.

I wanted to simply understand.

I could always tell that things weren’t okay on your end of the stick.

I’ve seen you try so hard to improve yourself.

I always wanted to help you figure things out.

Get yourself on the path that was for the better.

Somehow, your demons made sure that it couldn’t get to that point.

Unfortunately, you saw me act out of the norm.

Wrong things were said at the wrong time.

I tried to fix something that had already been broken, only to cause more damage.

The help I wanted to give you was unconditional.

The help I wanted to give you was love.

I wanted to give you so much of it that I couldn’t anymore.

I thought you were going to be it for me.

I thought so many things.

But your demons got the best of you.

I catch myself thinking about what could still be.

What could still happen if I made that first move?

Realizing that it won’t come back, but hoping it does.

No matter the form, but will soon come back.

Finally making through the fog, it comes to me.

I miss you.

I miss your mind.

I miss your voice.

I miss the way you’d address me.

I miss the late-night phone calls.

I miss the conversation. 

I miss you and me.

I miss us.

By Amira Wells