Dear Father

By Anna Abraham

I remember you polishing my shoes,

And sending me off to school,

With goodbyes filled with care,

With genuine smiles though they were rare.

But I also remember how you treated me,

Now you’re nothing but a painful memory.

And I get that everybody has that somebody,

Just to make you feel like a nobody.

But it’s not you who should’ve been,

The one who showed me how mean,

The world can be and it’s ruthless cruelty.

Parts of me keep asking,

“Is this how it should’ve been?”

The tears that dwells in the deepest parts of me,

Where no one can see.

I still have dreams where I’m trying to free,

Myself from your hypocrisy.

You hated the mere presence of me,

You try to make me regret it,

But trust me that’s just not how I felt it.

You broke and took a lot from me,

But as you can very well see,

I’m carrying myself and healing,

- just like every other human being.

I try to keep moving on leaving behind whatever is gone,

but parts of me are still holding on.

You were seldom there for me,

But you keep interrupting me,

And keep getting in between every good and bad memory,

Like you deserved a part of me.

I’ll give you the easy way out,

You may stay or leave,

All these grey shades are making me grieve.

I feel unexplainable anger lately,

But deep down I’m feeling heavy,

All this chaos is burdening me.

And I keep on carrying,

All these thoughts, though it is scarring.

But still, my heart is weeping for your love,

Cause you were the one sent for me from above.

And I wish every single day,

I still close my eyes in the dark and pray,

That someday, you’ll find your way,

Set right your mistake and open your eyes wide awake,

Cause I’ve opened mine.

You could be the father and I’ll be your sunshine.

By Anna Abraham