19, Later - By Ayola Satula

Written By: Ayola Satula

Category: Poetry

Competition: Global Poetry and Creative Writing Competition 2026

Ayola Satula, writing under the name "19, Later," contributes a poignant piece to the Global Poetry and Creative Writing Competition 2026. Her poem "19, Later" is a compelling exploration within the poetry category, inviting readers to delve into its rich tapestry of introspection and existential contemplation. Through her words, Ayola navigates complex emotions, offering a window into the human psyche with a unique voice that resonates deeply.

About the Work

"19, Later" by Ayola Satula offers a lyrical journey through the realms of self-discovery and emotional depth. The poem weaves a narrative that is both haunting and insightful, using vivid imagery and a reflective tone to probe themes of loss, identity, and rebirth. Ayola's style is characterized by its raw honesty and rhythmic flow, drawing readers into a world where every line invites introspection and emotional resonance.

19, Later

Original Submission by Ayola Satula

Ruling’s final, start it over

Teach your grudges to a boulder

It won’t help, it’s just to know ya

Park your heart where oats are warm

Grieve what’s beating in the storm

She’ll still leave you if you’re formed

Learn some secrets from the Earth

Don’t treat visits same as birth

Meaning’s hurtful when she’s colder

Say your name without some stealth

Sing this double if you’re well

Miss its absence while it’s felt

Die again

Seek your healing while you’re bound

But next time you look to be found

Just die again

I should paint you to your broad

I deserve her even now

I’ll usurp you when you down

I assert you don’t belong

Why you talking to yourself?

Christmas Eve, it’s no response

Up with Jesus on the cross

Santa rain deliver doubt

ADD turn ADT, then the silence come endowed

Then its you attempting space

Burn that image of yourself, or she’ll learn to build a case

No replying’s not a phase, simply speaking give it up

I’m not in your head for rent, maybe I should wendigo

Clearly I’m just eating at the wall that used to hang a goal

Clearly I’m just here to witness how you bury down your soul

Close the curtains, her or me?

Who you really give control?

Nigga, I could empty bottles with the type of shit you wrote

Bet you’ll use that as a quote

I should show you to a ministry to exorcise your cape

The conventional opinion pleads your faith

Be alone

Ruling’s final, start it over

Teach your grudges to a boulder

It won’t help, it’s just to know ya

Park your heart where oats are warm

Grieve what’s beating in the storm

She’ll still leave you if you’re formed

Learn some secrets from the Earth

Don’t treat visits same as birth

Meaning’s hurtful when she’s colder

Say your name without some stealth

Sing this double if you’re well

Miss its absence while it’s felt

Die again

Seek your healing while you’re bound

But next time you look to be found

Just die again

Block my number if it’s safe

I should keep the ceiling close

Doing laundry, folding hopes

Understand I’m out the race

There’s a rat that owns my bed

His contingent teach regret

Then he dirty shit for sex

I contend for lesser death

Ay, I just found me a rock

Everything looking real tricky right now, a diamond could pop

Yea, but that's all that it got

No sleeve, no chain, no sign it gon stop

But I swear on my name

I'm the mountain to watch

So I'm mounting the clock

Time gon tell it to the books how I broke my locks

I'm just doing my part

First things first, let me clear the assumptions

You a bum on some flush shit

Worst come to worst, I might die when the flood hits

But you ain't drowning the gumption

Next you could say, "At the bay, he deceive her"

While you believe in your own lies

I'll close the case, show the peeps I'm a demon

But I won't sell em how to trap the eyes

Switch to the optics, my light isn't camera ready

I'm a virgin to the male gaze

I'm a bottle to her running face

If I drop it, nothing steady

If I crop it, ratioed

So ten toes

9 really, lucky number

Maybe 6 in Toronto streets

Devils up, make it 7, brother

Build my kabbalah right now

Cause 22 I'll be out of primes

The grief buries me alive

I survived

Ask your ceiling for a mouthpiece

That's how all the mountains breathe

Told me that I do too much

You could say that if you stop me

Just quoting Baki

Dreaming of abortion

Hope I made it to the toilet

I'm seeing things through eyes I'll never have

Can't think to quote it

Tried to code it

There's a layer I can't figure out

Lost the motive

I should occupy a better doubt

My devotions always live inside another life

Why so focused on the things I'm never getting right?

Sleeping well

That's what you about

Keep yourself

Feel without your mouth

I don't think I'll figure it all out

What's a face?

I think that thing i'll reach for now

Dreaming of abortion

Hope I made it to the toilet

I'm seeing things through eyes I'll never have

Can't think to quote it

Tried to code it

Till some jiggles asked me what i'm bout

Lost the motive

I should occupy my flesh in doubt

I don't think I'll figure it all out

What's a face?

I think that thing we live without

First things first, you don’t treat me like you saw me

What I expect when bloody murder?

If I’m honest, I don’t drive, you got that on me

But I still drift, don’t throw a rock while I’m responding

I’d admit that there’s matters deserving vision

Cause everyone needs reminders of what they can’t

Misandry might just bind our blood in difference

A witty way to say we hate the way I am

Started thinking I’m some kinda monster

A thought you face towards the corner

But that’s not how I wanna live dawg

I’m only dark to find my reasons, not a border

It’s probably better I’m the wrong one

You don’t got the energy to leave

And I don’t have the peace of mind to fix this

Sit and grieve, I’ma a bop sumn

This hell got a deep arm

But I could sock sumn

We going fox hunting

Got a better conscience on my tail

Turned a 6 to a 9 dozen

Cracking in the wind completes my sail

Never said that I’m a fool and shit

I just made it rain to see your veil

Sit and grieve, I’ma bop sumn

Me to me, these people love you dawg

take some pride in what you never knew

tryna survive what i write

take some time where the picture grew

i think that falling off is cool now

show me how your lentils stand

learned to eat my veggies for the fam

i'm moving laughter like it's contraband

i think i found a tune now

tumour talk got too loud

but gotta ask it what to do now

facts from the spliff say my tolerance shit

ceiling asking me to move out

i'm rude bro

cool though

i dont give a shit to finish this

live or sumn

I feel like a rook

got a game in my mind, push the pace to the tide

if the storm reign heavy, get a book

so I’m building up a castle

put it where you find the fossils

fissure out a dead king from my tonsils

writings raps while my strong holds

what you seeing aint colossal, infinituum

tie a hook where the thoughts go

feel him in

tryna take a pic for god bro

fill him in

I could probably let my ma know, for filament

But the problem been with basho

Tryna plant my fa jin where the ma go

But my ka thin

Is my ka closed?

Diablo

Tryna tie my feelings to some tadpoles

Get some jumping cables, maybe then it snows

Sounds of some water drown my perfect rose

I’m good now

I feel what I could

Aint a case to rewind, push your plate to the blinds

I’ll be eating parfait till you look

Jump then

About the Competition

The Global Poetry and Creative Writing Competition 2026 by Hashtag Kalakar is a celebration of literary excellence, inviting participants from around the world to showcase their creativity. This prestigious competition encourages writers to explore diverse themes and express their unique voices, fostering a global community of poets and authors who share a passion for the written word.

We extend our heartfelt thanks to Ayola Satula for her thought-provoking contribution, "19, Later," to the Global Poetry and Creative Writing Competition 2026. Her evocative poem enriches the tapestry of voices in the competition, resonating with readers through its exploration of profound themes. We look forward to witnessing more of Ayola's literary journey in the future.

About Hashtag Kalakar

Hashtag Kalakar is a creative platform dedicated to providing artists, writers, singers and other creative talents with opportunities to showcase their work and reach wider audiences through competitions, features and creative initiatives.