Why Parents Should be a Bystander?

By Krishna Priya Madasani

Ever faced a situation where you are deprived of your right to make your own choices by your parents? How frequently do you think of these questions, ‘why can’t parents let their children make their own decisions’ or ‘why can’t they give them freedom to create their own world with full of their choices and preferences’? Have you ever thought of approaching this issue in view of your parents? Probably not. I can guess it since I’m also a seventeen-years-old-teenage-girl who dreams to do many things but couldn’t do just because her parents didn’t approve.

Firstly, parents love their children unconditionally that they couldn’t bear to see them get hurt or face any discomforts. So, they always consider various things while making a decision regarding the matters of their children. During this whole process, one thing they fail to do is considering the opinion of their child which is of utmost importance. They think of all the good and worst scenarios while making a decision for their child but utterly fail in predicting the status of their kid in future if one day he/she realises that this isn’t what they need.

Secondly, parents being overprotective don’t let their children make their own decisions thinking that they are not eligible in analysing a situation and knowing things like, what is good and what is evil. Decision making is an art that every child should learn. It is not something that can be learnt by watching someone or listening to their parents. It is an art learnt through actions. As said by Dr Christian Barnard, ‘we can’t appreciate light if we haven’t known darkness’, one cannot know the depth of any matter if he himself didn’t experience it.

It is important of a child or a youngster to make their own decisions be it small or big, in selection of a toy or a book, in choosing a better career or a life partner. Because, it is their life and they have to live it. At the same time, parents should play the role of a bystander and observe or guide them when necessary, in each and every step they take. Instead of doing so, making them deprive of their right to decide, in the name of concern or responsibility might lead to indecisiveness in one’s child. They may depend on their parents even for simple decisions. In order to prevent that parents should let their children see the world through their eyes and feel it with their senses.

Youngsters are bound to make some harsh and baseless decisions but that fact shouldn’t forbid them of their right to choose. At that time, Parents should provide enough trust for their children to consult them whenever they need some moral support. Because, when children fed up with their parent’s constant nagging about how they need to handle certain matters they may sometimes take some drastic steps without their parent’s knowledge. In such circumstances, parents may not have the chance to rectify them but to regret later.

In order to avoid all such scenarios, parents should let their children make their own choices either may be evil or angelic by letting them know that you are with them in their journey to correct them and to love them immensely. It gives massive strength to a person knowing they have someone to support them and to guide them no matter what they choose. they can easily face even the worst consequence with bare face. It gives them a sense of independence and self-trust.

By Krishna Priya Madasani