What's Real?

By Nimisha Yadav

"Are ghosts real? Am I real? Is time real? I don't think I am thinking straight. Why does life feel like a blur? Am I losing my mind? Is time going too fast or am I aging slow? What happened with me in the past, was that real or the things happening to me now, are they real? Am I hallucinating? Again? Where did I keep my medicines? Ughhhh. Why can't I remember anything? What happened to me last night? Where was I? Was I drugged? Or did I inject myself with something? What happened this morning? Was that lady real? Why did she look so much like Rachel? God, was it Rachel? Is Rachel alive? Am I dead? NO. Did I bury Rachel? Why do I see her? I don't want to see that doctor again. She'll give me more pills. I wanna die. Am I depressed? When did I last eat any real food? Wait real. What's real? Hey, hi, ma'am, hello, can you listen to me? Can I touch you to make sure you're real? Hey, why you looking at me like that? Why you making faces at me? I am not insane, you bitch. See I am real. Look at my hands, look at my face. I am real! Where was I this morning? Rachel? Where's Rachel? Dead? Alive? Ghost? Hallucination? Drugs? Alcohol? Weed? No, no, no, no. I ain't no junkie. I'm fine. I am sooo fineeeee. Hey, hey you kid, what you think you're looking at? I am super fine aye. Where the hell is my phone? Damn, did I drop it somewhere? Shit, I can't find it. I need to call Mike. I need to talk to him. Oh I

see a booth, yes, yes. I will call Mike, I need answers. Now. Can I make a call please, its really urgent, I think my wife is missing, something happened to her. No damn, I don't have a quarter, please, please let me make a call, my wife is in danger. Hey, sweet lady please can you help me out by lending me a quarter please, I need to make an urgent phone call. Oh God bless you, thank you so much. Hi, Hey, hey Mike, this is Leo, brother tell me where's Rachel? What do you mean who's Rachel? Damn Mike, my wife, Rachel. Yeah, tell me where is she? Is she alright? Is she with your wife, out shopping? I think she is in trouble! I think something happened to her. Will you call your wife to check up on her? Don't tell me to calm down Mike, just tell me where the hell is Rachel goddamnit?? Do you realize what absolute shit you're speaking Mike? The hell you saying? Yeah I am at the Green Street right now, why are you asking me that and where the hell is Rachel? Wait. What? Haha, no, no, no, no, not possible. Not at all possible. How the hell are you accusing me of something like that? I love my wife. I did not kill her, Mike."

By Nimisha Yadav